


The edge of the earth with you

by TheGirlNoOneKnows5



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Accidental Dating, Cruise, Even's POV, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Photographer Even, SKAM Big Bang, Travel, Unrequited Crush, bed sharing, meet ugly, mentions of mania
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-11-13 19:24:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 29,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18037388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGirlNoOneKnows5/pseuds/TheGirlNoOneKnows5
Summary: "Do you guys know each other?""Oh yeah, he's the man of my dreams," Isak joked. Hilarious. Even could play, too."Really?""We've been keeping our love a secret for months," Even said.-A romantic Arctic cruise along the west coast of Norway provided the perfect setting for Even to woo his crush. Accidently ending up in a fake relationship with a cute stranger, while the real object of his affection was in the arms of another was not at all in his plans.For the 2019 SKAM Big Bang





	1. Part 1: Plan A

**Author's Note:**

> It's finally here! So excited to share this with you all!
> 
> My artist is the lovely, talented gif maker, [Anja](http://parallel-univers.tumblr.com/) , who has been so kind and patient with me. Thank you for working with me :)  
> Have a look at her wonderful gifset [HERE!!](http://parallel-univers.tumblr.com/post/183359991584/the-edge-of-the-earth-with-you-for)
> 
> Listen to the playlist [HERE!](https://open.spotify.com/user/6yr78itaq8dirmhogtchd08zm/playlist/02IJsCnrXE3AfhXaNcfT55?si=0wGnYM1_Tl-lBs0mD6PTmQ) while you read ;)

 

The sun cleared the rain. As if some higher power sensed Even’s good mood and decided the day needed to match.

Today was wonderful. Any day Even got to see her was wonderful, extraordinary, spectacular. She smiled and the world smiled with her. It must have been _her_ call the sun answered.

Even breathed in that fresh rain smell as he stepped off the tram. Today was–

Shit. Today was shit and throbbing and on fire.

The guy in front of him tripped on his way out and headbutted Even right in the nose. His eyes instantly filled with tears. Vision compromised, Even stumbled forward, tumbling into the apologising klutz.

“Argh!”

“Whoa! Shit! That was my breakfast.”

The guy’s crisp bread was soaking in a muddy puddle on the pavement. Served him right. An electric ache pulsed through Even’s entire face. This guy was strong.

Said guy sorrowfully looked away from his would-be breakfast to glare at Even. It was the cute guy Even made eye contact with on the tram every other day. He wasn’t so cute after breaking Even’s face.

“I’d apologise, but it’s kind of hard to see when you’ve been punched in the face.”

“It wasn’t a punch.”

“Suppose a full head is worse than a fist.”

“It was an accident!”

Blood dripped to the pavement. Even cupped under his nose. “Shit. You’re right. I feel better already.”

“You need a tissue.”

“That would be ni–”

“Good luck with that.”

_Dick_

Not-so-cute guy charged off, leaving his crisp bread to its watery grave. That alone gave Even a small sense of satisfaction. While his face was on fire, Not-so-cute guy’s stomach was empty. _Ha._

Today was… okay.

He trudged the rest of the way to his building, hand slowly filling with blood. If that wasn’t the most wonderful way to begin the day.

It was 09:02 when the elevator opened on his floor. A large body shoved past him, ripping his hand away from his nose. A few drops of blood stained Even’s pale blue shirt. _Wonderful._

“Whoa, sorry.” William gave him a wave before the doors closed between them.

The light buzz in his shoulder wasn’t enough to distract Even from his dripping nose. A metallic taste filled his mouth. “Ugh.” Such a glamorous life he led.

“What happened to you?” Noora looked somewhere between concerned and suspicious. The perfect set up.

“I got mugged.”

“At nine o’clock in the morning?”

“Nine O three,” Mr. Magnusson said, pushing past Even towards his office. His expensive cologne clung to everything in the room. An extension of his constant foul mood, perhaps. “You’re late.”

All thanks to Not-so-cute guy and his titanium head. Even was more pissed that he’d ruined his good mood. Until he saw _her_.

“Morning.” _Sonja_. Her dress was yellow and her smile was radiant. Everything about her screamed ‘sunshine’. She’d make a lovely photograph. Even was shaken away from the thought by her hand on his arm. Her hands were cold like his. “What happened?”

“The mob boss I used to work for paid me a visit this morning.”

She pushed him away, sunshine smile returning. A few more drops of blood ran down Even’s chin. “Oh, here.” Sonja pulled a small packet of tissues from her pocket and handed them over.

“You just had those?”

“It’s the funniest thing; I picked them up this morning and thought I might need them. And here we are.”

She was amazing. Even might be a little in love.

“Dress with pockets,” Noora admired.

Sonja swished the bottom of her dress and laughed. Even would get punched in the face every day for a year just to hear that laugh. _God, she’s so–_

“I didn’t make millions standing around,” Magnusson called, even though they all knew he was no millionaire. “Time is money, people, come on!”

The team scattered, hurrying to their designated stations. Even’s desk was in the perfect spot for him to be able to look at Sonja whenever he felt the impulse. Which was a lot. It wasn’t weird at all. There was nothing weird about a little crush.

“Excited for this weekend?” Sonja asked. Her voice. Sonja’s voice could make angels weep. “Even?”

He blinked at her. “This weekend?”

“The cruise…?” _Shit._ “I’m guessing you forgot?”

“I didn’t forget. I was storing it in a different part of my mind.”

“And what part would that be?”

“It’s a secret.” 

Sonja laughed and the day was wonderful again. Not-so-cute guy was a fading memory in the glow of Sonja’s smile. “Like everything else about you.”

That’s the way it would stay. “Giving too much away at once is boring.” And dangerous.

“Nothing about you is boring, Even Bech Næsheim.” She said it like she meant it and Even fell a little bit deeper. He was doomed. “Anyway, are you excited?”

“I won’t lie, I’m not happy about having to bring my expensive camera equipment with me on a boat.”

“That’s the price of being a brilliant photographer.” She poised her hands up like she was holding a camera and made a ‘click’ action. “Any editorial piece we do is your show.” She handed him her imaginary photograph.

“You’re a natural.”

“ _You_ actually are.”

“Not better than me,” Mikael teased. He handed warm coffees and teas around to everyone… except Even. Mikael shrugged apologetically. “Everyone was here early.”

“And I was two minutes late.”

Mikael touched his fist to Even’s shoulder and sat at his own desk.

Another round of blood gushed out of Even’s nostrils. His body always had perfect timing. “Oh!” Sonja reached over to dab at his chin while he plugged his nose.

_Sonja_.

She was wonderful, spectacular, extraordinary. And her hands were cold, just like his.

“All better?” She was smiling and Even smiled back. It hurt, but he couldn’t help it. He would always smile back.

“All better.”

A scrunched up ball of paper bounced off his back. “Hope you don’t have a busted nose for this thing,” Mikael teased.

Even sighed, already weary from the two weeks ahead of them. The throbbing in his temples almost overpowered the sensation in his nose. “This whole thing may end up being a pain in my ass.”

“And face.”

“Getting paid to go on a cruise is a pretty good deal,” Chris said, peering over her computer. “I’ll write however many articles they want.” 

“That kind of thing mustn’t be a stranger to you, our very own superstar,” Even said.

“I wish,” she snorted. “Comedians don’t get taken _that_ seriously.”

“Or you wouldn’t have to work here between sets,” Mahdi joked beside her. He dodged the eraser she tossed at him. He wasn’t quick enough to miss Mikael’s. “This is workplace bullying.”

“Or a hate crime,” Chris said. She answered Mahdi’s look with a cheeky smile.

“I don’t know if I want to spend two whole weeks with you goofs,” said Sonja.

A collective faux-gasp echoed around the office, resembling an obnoxious sitcom audience. “I’m shocked, Sonja,” exclaimed Chris. “Shocked!”

“This is a betrayal.”

“A hate crime.”

Even took a different approach. “I might need you there to take care of my bumps and bruises.”

“Planning on getting into fights on the boat?”

“That old mob boss of mine isn’t a forgiving man, Sonja.” He gestured to his blotchy face. “This is only the beginning.”

“You’re cute.”

So what if that made Even’s heart skip.

Magnusson’s gruff voiced dissolved any warm, fuzzy feelings in Even’s gut. “You.” Everyone gulped. He pointed at Sonja and went back to staring at his iPad in disgust.

She stood. “Uh, Sonja, sir.” 

“Sure. Come here for a tick.”

She sent a hopeless look of ‘wish me luck’ around the room and disappeared with their boss into his office. Their voices carried out the door. William reappeared from wherever just in time to hear his father say, “What the hell is this crap? What, did you smash your head against the keyboard and think ‘good enough’?”

Secondhand embarrassment washed over the office as if they were all in there with her.

Today. Today was shit.

 

*********

“Maybe you should take another pair of snow boots,” mamma said as she hurried about the room, arms full of various trinkets. She dumped them on the crowded bed. “You can take your father’s, he won’t mind. Jan? Ah shit, we forgot to get you a thermos. JAN?”

Even leaned against his old desk, amusedly watching his mother flit about his childhood bedroom. He took her arms to still her. “Mamma,” he said calmly. “I’ve got everything I need. Stop worrying, please.”

“But… the snow boots–”

“Two pairs are more than enough.”

“And the thermos–”

“Why would I need a–”

Pappa crashed into Even’s door frame. He quickly recovered and slid into the room on his socks. “I was summoned?”

“Only four hundred times,” said mamma.

“Sorry, I was taking a sh–”

Mamma held up a hand. “Do not finish that sentence.”

“That’s fair.”

It seemed Even had been away for longer than he thought. In his absence, his parents had turned into twelve year olds.

“Even can borrow your snow boots, can’t he?”

“Mamma, I told you, I don’t need–”

“Listen to your mother, kiddo.” Pappa squeezed Even’s shoulder. The warmth of his hand was unsettling.

“Oh, and do we have a thermos?” Mamma wandered out, muttering to herself as she went. “I’m sure we’ve got one hidden away somewhere, if only I could find the little shit…”

Pappa tapped Even’s nose with his warm index finger. It kind of smelled. Even flinched away. Pappa laughed at him. “What’s with that face, huh?”

“She does remember I’m twenty five, yeah?”

“Come on, she’s your mum. Let her worry about you.”

“That’s all she ever does.”

Even sat next to the oversized suitcase on his bed. Shower shoes and plastic plates and all kinds of crap he wasn’t going to need spilled out of it. Shit knows how he was going to close the thing. They could still hear mamma talking to herself while she tore the kitchen apart. Sometimes Even really liked being back home. Today was not one of those days. 

He bounced with the bed when pappa sat on the other side of the suitcase. They heard a coat hanger crack under his butt. “Oops.” Pappa laughed nervously. He cleared his throat and Even thought, _Here we go._ “We can be a bit overbearing sometimes, I know,” he said with more self awareness he’d shown since Even got back. A rather nice change. “I’m sorry if we’re… But, Even, ever since Berlin, things have been so tough for your mum.”

_I’m_ _a burden like always_

“She barely sleeps since you - not to say that – well – uh… sometimes, you have to let us worry. All parents worry, especially–”

“If their kid’s crazy.”

“I didn’t say that. Even, please don’t put words in my mouth.”

_You’re not denying it_ , Even thought. “Sorry,” he said instead because he was an adult. He knew this conversation by heart. Better to play it their way.

“Look… I know mamma’s acting out of sorts, but she _is_ happy for you, going on this trip. You’ll get to be away from us for a while. Maybe make a move on, uh… Sara?”

“Sonja.” Glittering warmth filled his gut. Her name was all it took.

Pappa seemed to notice Even’s dreamy expression. He smiled and went on, “Sonja. And you’re going all along the west coast of the country. You’re going to have the time of your life while your poor old, jealous parents wait here for your return.” Even was unable to stop his smile. “Just humour her a little, yeah?”

“You realise she’s a grown woman, not a child?”

Pappa reached over to flick his arm. “You know what I’m saying. Play along and she’ll mellow out.”

“Alright,” Even chuckled. Pappa reached over to pat his leg. Even jumped up, out of reach. “Keep those hands away from me.”

“I washed them! I think.”

“Dad!”

“Found the bastard!” Mamma returned, holding a pink thermos above her head in triumph. She looked so pleased with herself, it was impossible not to smile along with her.

Even grabbed it and wrapped his free arm around her. “The trip is saved!”

She pushed him away. “Don’t make fun of me.”

“I mean it,” Even insisted through his laughter. He pulled mamma closer and planted a big, wet kiss on her cheek. “Thank you.”

She stroked his hair briefly before taking his chin to turn his head. “Mm. That nose is looking much better. Doesn’t hurt anymore?”

“Doesn’t hurt anymore.” He was glad the swelling had gone down. A puffy nose was not in Even’s plans for wooing the girl of his dreams. And woo, he would. Cold nights under the Northern Lights was the perfect backdrop for a romantic confession.

“Still sticking to your story about that?” pappa asked from the bed. Even sort of wished he’d piss off back to the bathroom.

“Is it so hard to believe I saved a nice old lady from being mugged?”

“Didn’t realise our son was Batman, is all.”

Stories were always more exciting than reality. That was especially true when the reality was some guy headbutting him on the tram at 08:50something in the morning. Even had decided Not-so-cute guy was kind of cute after all. He could’ve been nicer about the whole thing – it _was_ only an accident. The nose bleeds eventually stopped and Even’s face wasn’t broken. _And,_ it did mean Sonja being sweeter to him than usual. Even owed the guy, really.

He sent a silent message out into the universe; _Sorry about your breakfast._

*********

The MS Oline was magnificent. She towered proudly over everything by the dock.

Even couldn’t get enough shots of her. A middle finger appeared in front of his lens. Even lowered the Canon he’d affectionately named Frank to poke his tongue out at Mikael. He laughed and flipped Even off again. “Hold it there.” He backed away to get Mikael in a shot with the ship. “Perfect.”

“Are you two misbehaving?”

Even jumped. He held his beloved Frank tightly to his chest. “Sonja.”

“Good morning,” she laughed. Her brown coat brought out the green of her eyes. She was perfect. He barely registered her gesturing to the guy beside her. “This is–”

“What’s up, losers,” Mahdi called. He and Chris danced their way to the group, giggling and puffing by the time they reached them.

“Losers, hey? That’s the smartest thing you’ve ever said, Difi,” Magnusson called. The team jumped. Magnusson approached them, gruff frown matching his dull grey suit. _Why wear a suit onto a cruise ship?_ William walked a few paces behind him like a trained pup. Even wondered if he ever got tired of it. 

“Disi,” Mahdi corrected.

“Good for you.” He checked his watch, total disinterest clear. A man like Magnusson was far too important for pleasantries. “We need to meet the captain and some other people in twenty minutes, so get your shit and hurry up.” He paced towards the ship without a single glance back at his employees.

William raised a brow at everyone as if he were suffering as much as the rest of them and jogged after his father.

“Wait, we’re boarding a few hours before the actual boarding time?” Noora asked.

“Don’t question it, girl, come on!” Chris moved toward the ship in a half-skip, half-run. Arms spread wide, she looked like something right out of a movie. Even took a few shots, hoping to capture the childlike glee in her spirit. It was something to be marvelled.

While he was distracted, everyone had begun their trek towards the ship. “Oh, shit.” Even fumbled with his things and struggled to catch up. Gangly limbs did not help Even in a hurry.

“Come on, Bech Næsheim, we don’t want to have to leave you behind,” Mikael called. He was puffing by the cruise terminal.

“You’d all be lost without me!”

“Shut up, losers,” Magnusson said. No time for pleasantries, but plenty for insults.

_Prick_

 

*********

A mad dash to their rooms and up to the main deck left everyone sweating in their winter coats.

Magnusson grimaced once he got a look at Even’s flushed face. Any change in temperature was unkind to pale skin. Judging eyes gave the rest of them an unimpressed once over. “You could have at the very least _tried_ to make yourselves presentable, _fuck_.”

His annoyance was somewhat satisfying. There were times Even wondered if he was a sociopath. Then he remembered his boss was a dick and _everyone_ hated him. He’d bet money he wasn’t the only one who had dreams of kneeing Magnusson in the groin… and waking up with a grin. Violence was never the answer. Unless fantasising about one’s asshole boss.

“Everyone ready for the best two weeks of your lives?” A spirited middle-aged woman said. She was dressed in an official-looking uniform and stood with perfect posture. Several other uniformed people stood behind her.

Magnusson forced a smile at their new arrivals. “Oh, yes.” It was evident why he rarely smiled.

The woman, presumably their captain, clapped her hands excitedly. “That’s what I like to hear!”

Magnusson gestured to her. “Everyone, this is Captain Laila Haddad, Captain Haddad, this is my team. You’ll have to excuse their incompetence, they’re the best I could do.”

The captain laughed, though Even knew it was not intended as a joke. She shook everyone’s hands and tried to learn their names. All the warmth Magnusson was missing seemed to be in their captain. “Hurtigruten is excited you’ll be joining us on this coastline journey.” Somehow she made a generic line sound genuine. “We’ve got a large staff and a great ship with endless amenities, so if any of you need anything, we can always help.” Her companions all introduced themselves as having important positions. Even busied himself with candid shots of each person.

They all stood silently across from Even and his coworkers. “Anyone have any questions?” Magnusson asked, shooting Mahdi a pointed stare. 

“Oh.” He clumsily got his phone out. “Y-yes, can you tell us a little info about this particular ship, Captain?”

“I can tell you a lot. The MS Oline was launched recently, in 2021 as one of our few hybrid ships. She’s much more environment-friendly and energy efficient, which I’m sure you know are things we value at Hurtigruten.”

Mahdi nodded, furiously typing away on his phone. “I do. Oline is named after Captain Richard With’s first wife, is that right?”

The captan shared an impressed look with a young woman on her left. “Someone’s done their research.” The closest thing any one of them had gotten to praise in their entire employment. “Yep, this girl’s named after our founder’s baby-mama.” Everyone gave a polite laugh.

The schmoozing never ended with this line of work. Or any, from what Even had seen of the world. Fortunately for him, schmoozing was one of the few things he had expertise in. Say a bunch of pretty words with a flashy smile and he could make anyone believe anything. Not an entirely prideful skill, he figured, but a useful one.

“This is the first Hurtigruten coastline cruise leaving from Oslo, giving our guests a little more time to enjoy the ship and get to know their fellow passengers before we explore the ports. It’s a trial, and we’re so excited Nordic Escapes is going to be documenting the journey with us.”

“We won’t be a disappointment,” Magnusson said, giving the team a look not even satan would want to decipher. “Will we?”

The team made various affirmative sounds. Magnusson was unimpressed, as usual.

“We have no doubt your special issue will be nothing short of fantastic. Hurtigruten is confident in this partnership,” Captain Haddad said genuinely. She clapped her hands again. “Now. What say we chat a little more before we leave port, hm?”

 

*********

Loud cheers drowned out all the excited chatter.

Even took multiple shots of the passengers and shoreline as the ship pulled away from port. When the third alcohol-clad girl bumped into him, Even decided it was time for Frank to go away. He zipped the camera safely back in its case and breathed a relieved sigh.

“Not baby proof enough for you?” Mikael joked.

Even gave his case a pat. “Never is.”

“I can hold him for a while if you want to go get a drink?” 

He needn’t offer twice. Even handed Frank over to Mikael, knowing he’d be safe and sound until he returned. The beauty of being friends with another camera snob. “I’ll be quick.”

“Take your time,” Mikael countered as Even dashed off.

Squeezing through a crowd wasn’t much fun as a 6’4, gangly-limbed giraffe-man. Half the passengers he passed ignored him, while the rest looked offended at his mere existence. It didn’t bother him much. The desire for a cold drink was too strong. He was in the mood for something fruity. Maybe colourful.

His face was flushed by the time he finally pushed his way to the bar. “Heya,” Chris greeted. She swayed to the music, sipping a pink drink in a tall glass.

“Hey! You look like you’re already having fun.”

“I’m always having fun,” she said with a wink.

One of the many things he liked most about Chris Berg was how she found simple fun in anything. An easygoing person was refreshing to be around. Even never felt like he was playing a role around her. Chris wasn’t the kind to pry or push. She was someone who simply let others _be_. How he wished there were more like her.

Even realised far too late that he was standing way too close to the person in front of him. They crashed into him as they turned, drenching them both in freezing alcohol.

“Oh!”

“Shit!”

“You!”

Kinda-cute guy was even cuter with clear vision. Even laughed at the coincidence. “Do you make a habit out of bumping into people?”

“This time it was your fault.”

“True. And both times you lost your food.”

“I don’t think a cocktail counts as food.”

Chris danced over to Even and bumped his shoulder. “It does if you’re cool enough.”

“Or sad enough,” Even added.

“I’m starting to get depressed from this conversation,” Kinda-cute guy said.

Chris pointed her straw at him. “Shouldn’t joke about that.”

“Gallows humour.”

Even knew all about that. ‘Rather be laughing than crying’, an old friend used to say. Which was sad in itself, he supposed. The icy wind reminded both boys of their sticky situation. “At least a wet sweater is better than a punch in the face.”

“It wasn’t a punch.”

“And yet I got nosebleeds for the rest of the day.”

Kinda-cute guy squinted at him. “The nose looks much better.”

“The nose feels much better.”

They stared each other down for a while, pulling their lips in to hide twin smiles. Even cracked first. He usually did. Kinda-cute guy had a lovely smile. Even regretted he couldn’t capture it in a photograph. A stained sweater was all the evidence he needed that it was for the best. As long as Frank was safe.

“Even!”

“Isak!”

Sonja approached, arm linked with a vaguely familiar young man. They both waved with the enthusiasm of a boy band groupie on opening night. Everything melted away when Sonja smiled. The noisy crowd, the wind, the thick fabric sticking to Even’s skin. All that mattered was that she was happy.

The smile dropped when she stopped in front of him. “Whoa, what happened to you?”

“We had a little accident.”

“Wait a sec. Isak,” the young man said, cocking his head at Kinda-cute guy. “Do you guys know each other?”

“Oh yeah, he’s the man of my dreams,” Isak joked. _Hilarious._ Even could play, too.

“Really?”

“We’ve been keeping our love a secret for months,” Even added.

“Oh my God!” a squeaky voice chirped. It belonged to a vaguely familiar blonde girl in a pink coat. She was pointing her phone at them, making Even a little uneasy. “This whole time you’ve had a hot boyfriend?!”

Isak gulped at the camera, paling. “Oh, well–”

“That’s great, because I came over to introduce you to _my_ girlfriend,” said the man and–

“Huh?”

“This is Sonja.”

Sonja extended her hand to Isak, who shook it mindlessly. She beamed at Even and gestured to the man beside her while all Even’s hopes and dreams died before his eyes. It was the beginning of the end. “This is Julian.” _Fuck._ “My boyfriend.”

_Boyfriend_

“And this is Even. My friend.”

_Friend_

Even was a fool. A hopeless, loveless fool. What was he thinking, coming on here, hoping he could sweep the most beautiful woman on earth off her feet? Of course she had a gorgeous boyfriend. She was far too kind, too magnetic, too wonderful to be on her own. This Julian must be something. He was the same guy who’d been following her around all morning. And Even had been too busy making googly eyes at Sonja like the pathetic fool he was to consider who he might be.

_I’m an idiot_

“You never mentioned you were seeing anyone.”

Sonja’s lovely voice brought him back to his horrible reality. “Oh. Actually, we–”

“–Thought it would be fun to keep it a secret,” Isak said, latching onto Even’s arm.

Even gave him a ‘what the fuck?!’ look and Isak responded with one Even hoped he was misreading as, ‘just go with it.’

He tightened his hold on Even, stomping on his already downtrodden hopes. Their wet clothes stuck them together. “You know, to keep the excitement alive.” Isak laughed awkwardly. All Even could do was laugh along with him. _What. The. Fuck._   

“Wait, wait, wait, wait.” Chris gulped down the last of her drink and held her free arm out wide. “Is this for real? You guys are together?”

“Mm, Yep.”

“And you’ve been keeping it a secret for months?”

“Yep.”

Her stare turned on Even for double confirmation. “Uh, yep,” he said without thinking. Quite a problem of his, not thinking.

“You guys are _so_ cute together,” the blonde girl said. “Eskild is going to scream!”

Isak pushed her hand away. “Can you keep that away from my face for one second?”

“Come on, my fans love you!” 

Chris clicked her fingers and stumbled. She grabbed onto the girl’s shoulder to balance herself. “That’s where I know you from! You’re that YouTube chick. Vilde-Net or something.”

“Oh my God, you’re Christina Berg!”

“You’ve heard of me?” She let go of her and tried to strike a wobbly pose. “My fans are far and wide.”

“I’ve seen like six of your shows,” Vilde said.

“Isn’t she funny?” Even enthused. Not quite as much of a joke as he was right now.

Two long arms snaked around Isak’s shoulders. He yelped and jumped away from Even. Freedom.

“It’s only me, baby Jesus,” said a tall redhead.

“Eskild, fuck!”

“So, _this_ is the gorgeous hunk of spunk I’ve been hearing so much about?” Isak’s face turned several shades darker while Eskild looked Even up and down. He rather liked being thought of as hunky.

“News spreads fast,” Julian laughed.

Vilde held up her phone. “It does when you’re on livestream.”

“Shit.” Isak ran a hand through his hair as if _he_ hadn’t gotten them into this.

Even wrapped an arm around him. “If no one minds, I’d like a quick word with _the man of my dreams_ ,” he said, guiding Isak away from prying ears and grabby hands and intrusive livestreams. Isak was tense beside him until they were deep in the crowd. “So, you wanna tell me what that’s all about?”

Isak got out of his hold. “Not particularly.” All Even had to do was stare at him for a few seconds for him to crack. “Fuck, I panicked! Julian was – and I thought he – I wanted to –” His shoulders slumped. “Shit.”

“You like him, huh?”

“No,” Isak scoffed. He kicked at the floor. “Well, yeah… I guess.” Even laughed. “What?”

“I like Sonja.” Isak thought it was just as funny as Even did. At least he wasn’t the only hopeless fool on this ship.

Isak pulled at the hem of his purple-stained sweater. “Maybe we could… could help each other?”

“What?”

“You know.” He glanced over at Sonja and Julian. They were laughing in each other’s arms. _Ouch._ Still, if she was happy…

“Isak, I’m not going to ruin Sonja’s relationship.”   

“No, I didn’t mean that, I just…”

“We could just tell them it was a joke.”

“Who jokes about shit like that?”

“This whole thing started as a joke, so…”

A series of loud pings came from Isak’s back pocket. He pulled out his phone while the pings continued. “Fuck.”

“Everything… okay?” Even asked, unsure if it was his business to ask.

“Apparently everyone I know watches Vilde’s dumb thing.”

“And now they all think you have a hot boyfriend?” Even waggled his brows.

Isak rubbed at his eyes with one hand, everything about him screaming ‘done’. “Why do I always get myself into shit like this?”

It stirred something in Even. Damn his heart. “Okay… I guess we could say we broke up.”

“Then we’d have to act all sad the whole time.”

It wasn’t as if Even had no experience in that matter. He took in Isak’s dark circles, his weary eyes, shoe digging into the deck. Surely they couldn’t – A familiar laugh got his attention. Julian was kissing Sonja’s neck and tickling her sides. They were disgustingly sweet. Which only served as a reminder of how much of a fool Even was.

He was going to regret this. “Alright. Why don’t we just pretend?”

Isak’s head snapped up. “Like a fake relationship?”

“Sure.” Making up stories was all Even did for fun, so this should be a breeze… right?

“But then we’ll have to spend all our time together and… hold hands and, I don’t know, act like we’re doing lame couple stuff.”

Even shrugged. “It’s only two weeks.” Isak scrunched his face. “Unless you’d rather explain to all Vilde’s fans we made it up.”

Another glance at their little entourage gave them a view that left them both wanting to bleach their eyes. Sonja was licking Julian’s lips, his hands resting dangerously close to her ass. Vilde kept her phone pointed at them, likely giving her viewers much more than they would ever ask for. If they went any further, they’d be shooting amateur porn.

Isak sighed loudly, drawing Even’s attention back. “Fuck it. I need to get drunk.”

Even followed closely behind him on their way to the bar. “I’ll buy you a drink.”

“Because that’s what _good_ _boyfriends_ do?” Isak mocked. 

Even flicked the bottom of Isak’s sticky sweater. “Because I kind of owe you one.”

“Consider it repayment for the nose.”

 

*********

The world beneath rocked. Nausea rose through Even’s gut as he came back to consciousness. Even knew it would be one of those days where it was hard to exist even before he was able to form a coherent thought

“Ugggh.”

A quiet laugh beside him made him snap his eyes open. He rolled over to big green eyes, blond curls and a sleepy smile. “Not feeling well, _honey_?”

“What the fuck,” Even groaned groggily. 

“Are you seriously hungover right now?”

Even draped an arm across his eyes. “Don’t laugh at me.”

“I’m not laughing,” Isak laughed.

“Wanna remind me why we’re in the same bed?”

The bed bounced as Isak sat up, unsettling Even’s already upset stomach. “Relax, we didn’t have sex.”

“Was my breath that bad?”

Isak rolled his eyes rather endearingly. “Do you really not remember last night, _sweetie_?”

_Sweetie_

The memory of a drunken Isak leaning into him came forth. One drink had turned into another, then another, until Even lost count. Isak was treated to a front row seat of Even’s low alcohol tolerance. They clung to each other all night, joking and cackling about their own idiocy while they watched the objects of their affections in each other’s arms.

Fortunately, their friends had been too busy getting trashed to push too many questions. That hadn’t stopped Even from stroking Isak’s back and calling him corny pet names all night.

_“Would you like another drink,_ honey _?”_

_“Anything for my_ sweetie _.”_

A faint memory of lips on his, hands in hair, a tongue against his, breaths mingling startled him so much, he shot upright. His head did not like that one bit and clouded with dizziness.

He peaked at Isak, who seemed amused at Even’s obvious realisation. “Not bad enough to stop your tongue down my throat, I guess.”

“You kissed me first!” Isak protested.

Their drunken bantering filled Even’s spinning head.

 

_“We can do better than that,” Isak scoffed, glaring at Sonja and Julian’s passionate make out just metres away._

_“Think so,_ babe _?”_

_“Oh, you’re doubting me?”_

_“Not at all –” he burped “–_ darling.”

_“You don’t think I can do it,” Isak said, scandalised._

_Even twirled a curl by Isak’s ear. “Can’t judge if I haven’t seen all the competitors.” Another burp. “_ Honey _.”_

_Isak pulled him closer by the waist, pressing their sticky sweaters together. “I’ll show you a competitor.”_

 

Even raised a brow at Isak, cruel pounding cutting through the fogginess in his head. “That’s not how I remember it.”

“You tell anyone and I–”

“We’re supposed to be _boyfriends_ , remember? No one’s going to care.”

He remembered Chris’s wolf whistles and Mahdi’s insistence that they ‘get a room.’ Isak’s phone blew up all night, while Vilde’s phone was an ever-present companion throughout. Eskild eventually dragged them both to this room and put them to bed, where they passed out cold.

Even tried to smile, but all his aching face could manage was a grimace. “I’m pretty sure everyone saw us, anyway.” Isak sank back against the pillows. “What?”

“Are we actually doing this? This whole fake relationship thing?”

“We can always come clean,” Even said, poking at a bruise on his arm he had no recollection of. “There’s nothing forcing us to do this.”

Isak rubbed his face. “Except the fact that we’ll look like massive idiots if we tell anyone.”

“Does it really matter that much?”

“ _Everyone_ knows. You said it. How else are we supposed to explain it now?”

“So, then. We go through with it.” Isak sighed again. “What do you want to do, Isak?”

He pushed himself off the bed. “I want to go get food. Do yo–”

The door flung open, revealing Eskild in a fluffy sweater on the other side. He held the room key high in the air. “Oh, good, you’re up.”

“Can we help you…?” Isak narrowed his eyes at their uninvited guest.

“You absolutely can. I’m here to grab my stuff.”

Mikael slid into the room after him with Even’s monstrous suitcase. He pushed it to sit against the end of the bed, pink in the face. “What are you keeping in there?”

“Uh, guys? What’s going on?” Isak asked.

Eskild put on a pair of sunglasses and posed. “We’re switching rooms,” he said as if it should be obvious.

Isak snatched the sunglasses off him. “You – you don’t need to do that.”

“And keep you boys apart? Why, we could never!” There was a gleam in his eyes that said he was getting a real kick out of this.

“We don’t mind, do we?” Isak looked at Even pleadingly.

He was too hungover for this. “I’m too hungover for this.”

“Then, it’s settled! The lovebirds will have a love nest.”

It took several more minutes of shifting around and Isak sulking in the corner before all of Eskild’s things were replaced with Even’s. Isak eventually had to chase him out the door, Eskild yelling, “Remember safe sex, boys!” as he went.

Isak banged his head against the door after closing it. “ _Your_ friend doesn’t talk that much.”

“Kind of guy who only speaks when he has something to say.”

“Better than one who never knows when to shut up.”

Even laughed and the sensation hurt his entire body. This was his karmic punishment for making an absolute moron of himself. Yet he never learned.

Isak walked over to where Mikael had piled all Even’s belongings and crouched down. He was quiet for a while. Then, “Are you an assassin, or something?”

“What?”

“You’ve got all these little black cases. Looks kinda suss.”

“You got me. You’re my current target, actually.”

Isak’s head popped back up. “Oh, really?”

“Mm. But you might be able to convince me to change my mind.”

“How?”

“Water. Lots and lots of water. Maybe some painkillers. And then tell me about yourself.”

Lots and lots of water was how Isak became Even’s hero. He returned with an armful of bottles, along with some sandwiches. He scrunched his nose at the loot as he spread it all out on the bed. “It’s all I could carry.”

“My hero.”

Isak smiled through his eye roll . He dug through his backpack, then tossed a packet of generic panadol at Even. “Don’t take them all at once,” he teased. He got comfortable and tucked into one of the sandwiches. “So… what’s with all the bags?”

“You already guessed it.”

“Come on.”

After two tablets and a _big_ gulp of water, Even was willing to give him anything. “I’m a photographer.”

“Of course you are.”

“What does that mean?” Even laughed.

“You looking like every coffee shop indie movie protagonist with your cool jackets and joints behind your ear and all your hair. Of _course_ you’re a photographer.”

Even smiled. “You _were_ staring all those times on the tram.”

“Staring… noticing. Call it what you want.”

“Alright then, cool guy, what do _you_ do?”

“Working at a pretzel shop until I can get a real job.”

“Making pretzels is a real job,” Even defended. Pretzels were a wondrous service the world would be lost without. Even was very grateful to every and all pretzel shops.

Isak took a swig of Even’s water and handed it back despite there being two unopened bottles by his leg. “I mean like something I _actually_ want to do. Once I’ve got all my qualifications.”

“And what do you actually want to do?”

“Paediatrician.”

Even nodded. “Impressive.” He finished what little water Isak left him. “Much more impressive than a lowly photographer.”

“Not with all your…” he gestured vaguely, “stuff.”

“Stuff.”

Isak pulled a face at him. Even reciprocated. “So did you come on here for the aesthetic, or?”

“No,” Even laughed. “You think so little of me.” Isak said nothing to correct him. “I’m with Nordic Escapes magazine and we’re doing a special Hurtigruten edition.”

“Like what, hot things to do in the cold?” Isak joked.

“I should introduce you to my boss. You could have a future in journalism.”

“Hilarious.”

Even waggled his brows at him. He opened the second bottle of water. “What brings an important paediatrician-to-be on an Arctic cruise?”

“Am I the next hot scoop?”

“We’ll see.”

Isak narrowed his eyes at him, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly. He shook his head. “It’s really lame. Our workplace won best small business for the fifth year in a row and our boss wanted to celebrate.”

“Not a bad way to celebrate.”

“Yeah well, our boss is rich, so we figure she has a few connections to get us the prices we got.” For her sake, Even hoped Magnusson wasn’t one of those connections.

There was a brief lull in the conversation while they ate their mediocre sandwiches. “And you work with… with that Julio guy?”

“ _Julian_. Yes.”

Even laughed, running a hand through his mess of hair. “I can’t believe it. I mean, what are the odds our crushes are dating each other?”

“It’s pretty weird.”

“I’d almost say it’s like the plot of an early 2000s rom-com.”

“Right, so you and I are supposed to fall madly in love?” Isak laughed.

“If this were a movie, probably.” But it wasn’t. “But it’s not.”

“No.”

They smiled at each other. Even held out his hand. “I’m Even. Even Bech Næshiem.”

“What are you doing?”

“We never had a proper introduction.”

Isak shook Even’s hand, amused. “Adrian Eksett.” Even quirked a brow. Isak chuckled. The gentle sound soothed his head. That, or the pain meds were kicking in. “Isak Valtersen.”

“So, Isak Valtersen. Do you want to be my fake boyfriend?”

“We’ll see.” 

 

*********

The one good thing about hangovers was that they usually didn’t last long. Even stood at the breakfast buffet the next morning, refreshed.

“There you are!” Mikael stood beside him.

“Morning.”

“You didn’t come out of your room all day.”

The headaches and continuous waves of nausea hadn’t left him until the night. Isak made fun of his low alcohol tolerance all day, though he took care of him well. “I was… indisposed.”

“Is that what the kids are calling it these days,” Chris joked, appearing at his other side.

“I probably would have thrown up on him if we tried anything.”

“Some people are into that.” The boys shuddered. “I love freaking you two out.”

“What’s freaky?” Mahdi’s plate was covered in a mountain of food. “Oh.” He nodded at Even. “You and your _sweetheart._ ”

 Even cringed. “Sorry you all had to witness my drunken antics.”

“You gave me some new material,” Chris said, moving along the buffet. “Don’t worry, I never use real names in my sets.”

“Yeah, but that blonde girl was putting them on her Insta and snapchat all night,” Mahdi said.

Isak was not going to like that. He was sitting with his coworkers a few metres away with a horrid expression on his face. Vilde was in the middle of some grand story, likely the cause of Isak’s expression. At that moment, he looked up and frowned at Even in question. Even answered with a smile and quirked brow. Isak rolled his eyes, redirecting his attention to his breakfast.

“Wow, you are really whipped,” Mahdi said, having watched the entire exchange.

“You missed Bergen yesterday, but Mikki boy got lots of footage you can take stills from,” Chris said.

“Mikki boy,” Even laughed.

“I’m okay with this,” said Mikael.

“Because all my ideas are genius.” She walked to a table with Mahdi, continuing on with her genius talk.

Mikael turned his stare to Even once they were alone again. Even shifted his eyes. “…what?”

“You and this boy,” Mikael said, glancing at Isak, who was laughing now. It was a much nicer sight than a scowl. “I’m not buying it.”

Even turned back to the buffet, putting a hash brown onto his plate. “What?” he gave a small laugh as if the very idea they could possibly be faking was ridiculous.

“Staring longingly at Sonja everyday for the last six months? Not as subtle as you thought.”

“What’s your point?”

“You’ve been making heart eyes at Sonja but you’ve been seeing ‘the man of your dreams’ the whole time?”

Even bit away a smile. The man of his dreams. This entire situation started with that damn phrase. “Not the whole time.’’

Mikael shook his head. “Alright, if you don’t want to tell me what’s up… Just be careful, man.”     

“When am I not careful?”

“I don’t think you want me to answer that.”

It was intended as funny. Instead it brought up a memory Even would rather not visit. Ever again. The sound of sirens were so close, even now. People’s gasps and laughs. All the sensations and feelings of that night were always right under the surface. The madness, the thrill, the shame, the humiliation.

Even didn’t finish his breakfast that morning.

 

*********

Tore Andes had to be the tallest man in all of Norway. The tour guide towered over Even, something he never knew possible. It was no surprise such a giant man had a booming voice that echoed in the street. 

“Welcome, everyone, to the Art Nouveau town of Ålesund!” He spread his arms out wide like a child showing their mother a craft they were proud of. “Take a look at these beautiful buildings around us.”

Even had taken several shots already. The town was something out of a fairytale.

“These are the result of a fire that devastated Ålesund in 1904. Anyone heard the story of the cow that kicked over the torch? They say that’s what started the fire that destroyed almost the entire city centre. The strong wind, coupled with all the houses being made of wood meant the town was pretty much doomed,” he said with wide eyes. He paused for dramatic effect, staring at the group a little too long. “Over ten thousand people were forced to flee quickly as the flames engulfed their homes… But!” The group jumped at his sudden exclamation. “Aid from within Norway, as well as from Germany saw the town being completely rebuilt into the stylish place you see today.” 

“So… the fire was kind of a… good thing?” William asked. His father whacked him on the back of the head as if he were a misbehaving child. Mahdi and Chris stifled their snickers.

“It was good for our development.”

“But everyone lost their homes,” Noora said sadly.

“That they did, Miss. But then they gained whole new ones!”

It was easy to look at a situation objectively if the person hadn’t been present. Even pictured the buildings around him in flames, people running for their lives, no time to mourn the memories lost. _Christ._ Had he always been this morbid?

Tore walked them around the town for over an hour. He had a little fact about _everything_ , right down to the dust. Frank got a good work out with the hundreds of shots Even took.

The attention turned to Even when the group piled into a minibus and set off towards Mount Aksla, which Tore excitedly told them was home to the best view of the city, and in his humble opinion, all of Norway. 

The bus just pulled away when Sonja patted his knee with a cold hand and asked, “So, tell us more about Isak.”

“Yes, Even, tell us more about Isak,” Mikael echoed.

Even laughed nervously, having little idea as to what he could say. Other than the fact that Isak played a good nurse to the needy, overgrown child Even became when hungover. “Uh. What do you want to know?”

“How’d you two meet?”

_Shit._ They hadn’t thought of that. In fact, they hadn’t officially decided whether or not they were really doing this at all. Rather than discussing their options again, they’d ended the night laughing at stupid old memes that hadn’t been funny in years. This was Even’s last chance to back out and come clean before it was too late. He figured it wouldn’t be fair to decide without Isak’s input. Except, Isak _was_ technically the one to start the whole ruse. And he wasn’t _that_ bad. Two weeks was nothing.

The best stories strayed as far from reality as possible. The most believable stuck closely to the truth. “The tram.” Everyone but Magnusson, who was busy frowning at his phone, stared at him expectantly. “He tripped and I caught him.”

“Sounds just like a rom-com,” Chris said.

“That’s what I said,” Even laughed. “But he thought it was lame.”

“He’s right,” said Mahdi.

“How long ago was this?” Mikael asked, poorly masking his skepticism.

Even made sure to reveal nothing on his face. “Two-ish months.”

“I can’t believe you’ve been keeping your boyfriend a secret for two-ish months,” Sonja said.   

“So have you.”

“I don’t keep Julian a secret. We’re more private, that’s all.”

“Tell that to our eyes,” Mahdi scoffed. “I’ll never get the image of you guys licking each other’s faces out of my head.”

Sonja’s cheeks coloured a pretty pink. “I’m sorry,” she laughed, embarrassed. That laugh. How Even adored that laugh. “Wow, we _never_ act like that, I’m so sorry.”

“I enjoyed it,” said Chris. “I don’t know what everyone’s complaining about.”

“The way you guys were going at it, you would swear it was a competition.” Mikael said, mischievous gleam in his eyes.

If that’s how he wanted to play, so be it. “We won, obviously,” Even said. 

“Whoa,” Sonja objected. “I think Julian and I made a pretty good case.”

Even remembered. Watching her laugh at Julian’s jokes and hold his hands and play with his hair and kiss him all night was torture. That must’ve been why Isak never objected to another drink when they both knew they were well over their limit. At least Even was. “Pretty good isn’t great.”

“Okay, Mister Big Romantic,” she said and oh, she had no idea. “Why don’t the both of you join us for dinner tonight?”

“Like a double date?”

“Why not?”

“Thought that only happened in movies.”

“You’re a big movie buff,” she said. “So why not?”

Isak was going to hate him.

 

*********

Julian raised a glass. “To… adventures.”

Even and their companions raised their glasses to reciprocate. Both ‘couples’ sat across from each other, making nothing more than tedious small talk. It was so quiet while they ate, they heard every bite and sip and swallow as if they were all chewing right into to their ears.

Isak was tense beside Even. When their eyes met, Isak’s sour expression turned accusatory. ‘You got us into this’, it said. Admittedly, Even was rather sorry for it. This night couldn’t be more of a disaster unless the ship hit an iceberg. _Would it really be that much of a shame,_ Even wondered.   

“So,” Julian said, swallowing his pasta with a big gulp. “Isak said you met in our shop.”

Sonja frowned. “Thought you said you met on the tram.”

 “The first time we _saw_ each other was at the pretzel place. The first time we _talked_ was on the tram,” Even lied easily. “Remember, babe?”

“How could I forget?” Isak said sarcastically.

“I don’t ever remember you coming in,” said Julian.

Even shrugged, going for nonchalant. “Maybe I really do have a forgettable face.”

“Not to me,” Isak grumbled. 

“Lucky me,” Even said, bumping Isak’s shoulder with his.

“You’re cute,” Sonja laughed, hand in front of her mouth. She was sweet even with a mouthful of chicken.

“He’s a dork,” Isak corrected, bumping Even back.

A familiar voice made Sonja pale instantly. Magnusson was talking brashly into his phone about an unknown person’s incompetence. The person on the other end had to be the most patient being on earth. “Even just _knowing_ she’s around makes me want to tie myself to blocks of cement and throw myself overboard, _fuck_.”

“I am so getting fired,” Sonja said.

“He could be talking about anyone,” Even said gently.

“He hates me.”

“He hates everyone.”

“I bet he’s just like Isak,” Julian said.

Isak frowned at him. “Are you saying I’m an asshole everyone hates?”

Julian finished off his wine in one scull. “No, I mean he probably acts all mean and tough, but deep down, he’s probably just a big old softy.”

Clearly Julian had not spoken to the man who may in fact be satan himself. The wine must be getting to his head. Sonja and Even struggled between scoffs and laughter. “I’d believe he’s a robot before believing there’s anything soft about that man.”

“It’s not impossible,” Julian said defensively. “We don’t know what he’s like in his alone time.”

“Sleeping upside down like a bat?” Even suggested. Isak was watching him, amused. “Something to add?”

“This reminds me of bagging out teachers in high school,” he said.

“He does treat us like kids, sometimes,” Sonja said. “My last online article sucked, so he banished me to a ‘what to wear’ section. It’s like, why am I even here?”

Julian rubbed her arm. “It’ll be the best ‘what to wear’ guide the world’s ever seen.”

Isak made a strangled sound into his beer. It sounded suspiciously like a gag. They exchanged a small smile, quickly folding their lips in so the others wouldn’t notice. Even glanced at his phone under the table, showing Isak the time. “He doesn’t appreciate your genius,” Even said without pausing his stealthy action. “But he will.”

“It’s getting kind of late,” Isak said.

“It’s only a little after 21,” Julian protested. “We can get dessert.” Who was the guy kidding? There was being polite, and then there was pure obliviousness. It was time for this horror of a date to end.    

Sonja seemed to be likeminded. “I _am_ getting tired,” she said, stretching her arms out. The dimmed light of the restaurant created perfect lines and shadows along her white sweater. Even’s fingers itched for his camera. What a missed opportunity.

Julian’s voice snapped him out of it. “I guess we should call it a night, then,” he said, having the decency, or perhaps it was pure ignorance, to look a little disappointed at their proposed parting. “It was nice.”

Even plastered on a polite smile. “It _was_ nice. I’m glad you suggested this,” he nodded to Sonja. “We had a good night.” Bullshit, bullshit and more bullshit.

He could tell Isak was holding in his laughter. “Mm hm, yeah,” he agreed. Keeping it simple.

They paid for their meals and watched Julian and Sonja walk off, comfortable in each other’s arms. Isak sighed. “I guess we’re really doing this, huh?”

“We can come clean anytime,” Even assured him. People thinking he was an idiot didn’t phase him. He’d been thought of as much worse before.

“Whatever,” Isak said. He led the stroll back to their room. “We need a story to stick to. So people don’t suspect anything.”

“We have one; It was love at first sight when you made me a pretzel and then you fell into my arms on the tram.”

Isak huffed a laugh. “That’s awful.”

“It’s what we got. Hope you’re a good liar.”

“I am the master of lying.”

“A little concerning, but useful.” Even chuckled at Isak’s play glare.

They easily fell into step with each other. “I told my friends we met three months ago.”

“I told my friends two.” Isak looked at him. “-ish.”

His phone pinged. “Shit.”

“Vilde again?”

Isak showed him what had to be the most unflattering picture he’d ever seen, coming from a photographer. He and Isak were locked in an open-mouthed kiss, looking like they were trying to eat each other. Their hands clung to the other’s hair and their legs were entwined. He wasn’t too sure how they’d gotten into that position standing.

“It’s on her Insta story.”

“Why wait until now to post it?”

“She wants to humiliate me.”

Even stood back, taking on a look of exaggerated shock. “Are you ashamed of being seen with me?”

Isak rolled his eyes and picked up the pace. “You know it. I’m not sleeping on that crappy little couch, by the way.”

“I won’t fit on it,” Even said.

“And you think I will?”

“Guess we’ll have to snuggle, then.”

Isak pushed him away with a laugh. “Yeah right.” 

Two weeks. It was nothing.

****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tell ya, it was a rocky rode mates and I almost gave up 2121 times, but a bitch pushed through. 
> 
> First off, a huge thank you to [Julia](http://chloevlntine.tumblr.com/) for arranging this whole shebang (see what I did there?)  
> Also a ginormous thank you to [Catarina](https://teejaysnow.tumblr.com/) for all your ideas and support. And of course the threats from your hedgehogs, whom without this story most likely would have been abandoned. Everyone go read her [Isak The Vampire Slayer](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/skambigbang2019/works/18012818) fic!  
> Thanks to [panshambles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/panshambles/pseuds/panshambles) for coming up with Nordic Escapes! Otherwise the magazine would've been called something laaame, so thank you :)
> 
> I am in no way affiliated with Hurtigruten, but I do want to go on one of their cruises one day. A girl can dream.  
> If you want to know Isak's head space during the first scene, check out the song I hate you, my friend doesn't like you either by The Big Oaks, for a laugh
> 
> Stick around for parts 2&3 and let me know what ya think!  
> P.S watch Lovleg  
> P.P.S March/April is gonna be hectic with all the remakes rip 
> 
> Come say hi to me on tumblr at [thegirlnooneknows5](http://thegirlnooneknows5.tumblr.com/)  
> My ask is always open and I am always lonely <3


	2. Part 2: Fools

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Adventures, shenanigans and bonding  
> Buckle in, kids ;)
> 
> Check out the artwork [HERE!!](http://parallel-univers.tumblr.com/post/183359991584/the-edge-of-the-earth-with-you-for)
> 
> Listen to the playlist [HERE!](https://open.spotify.com/user/6yr78itaq8dirmhogtchd08zm/playlist/02IJsCnrXE3AfhXaNcfT55?si=0wGnYM1_Tl-lBs0mD6PTmQ) while you read!

 

“Alright,” said Magnusson, in a voice that was unsettlingly calm. “Let me have it. What have you all got so far?”

The team looked around, no one daring to be the first to speak.  Even cleared his throat. “Mikael and I have some great footage and–”

Magnusson waved him off. “They’re pictures. No one cares, Ivan.”

“Even.”

“Sure.” He smacked his hands down on the table, making the glasses wobble. It got the attention of some of the other passengers nearby. “Come on people, it’s been five days, give me something!”

“Four days,” William corrected.

“Not interested. This is the biggest deal we’ve ever had, you all need to get on the ball. I need words!” He got up and walked off, grumbling various phrases about their uselessness.

“I don’t think he’s been sleeping well lately,” Chris said, tongue in cheek.

“Or ever,” Noora chimed.

“Ugh, whatever.” Sonja groaned. “My feet ache from walking around all day. I’m going to the hot tubs.”

“Need some quality time with your honey?” Chris waggled her eyebrows. The image of Julian’s hands all over her, rubbing her shoulders, holding her close, made Even want to choke. Sonja gave her a wink and left, a bounce in her step.

Even was in desperate need of some solace. He noticed Mikael watching him with a knowing look. He tilted his head at him, to which Mikael just shrugged. It wasn’t as if he wanted to keep Mikael in the dark. He and Isak had made an agreement; tell no one.

He trudged back to their room, glad to find it empty. Taking advantage of the silence, Even turned on some music and looked through the pictures he’d taken of Trondheim that day. There were considerably less pictures today than the hundreds from Ålesund. There was much more excitement to him in a place he’d never been. It was a shame so many of the shots wouldn’t be used. No one would see the shot of the little gnome someone had wedged into the grass by the bathrooms at Mount Aksla. The many, many shots of all the big, fluffy dogs in town. The candid shots of locals going about their days while Even and his team had wandered around as tourists. So many images never to see the light of day.

The door opened and Isak went straight for the bed. He spread himself out with a contented sigh.

“Busy day, dear?” Even asked.

“Bike ride around the city. You?”

“Another walking tour. The cathedral was really cool. How’d you go biking in the cold?”

Isak rolled over and propped himself up to face Even on their little couch. “We sucked it up. Whatcha working on?”

“Just looking through some pictures.” He pulled a face. “Magnusson’s already on our asses for shit.”

“He really is the devil, isn’t he?”

“You have no idea.”

Isak played with his fingers for a while. “So, um. I was thinking.” Even looked up, intrigued. “Boyfriends… like, hold hands and touch and stuff.”

“Do you want to hold hands?”

Isak’s face darkened. “I just – I think we should practise, don’t you? Julian’s always _touching_ Sophie–”

“ _Sonja_.”

“Right. Well, they’re always so close, I just think it might look… weird if _we’re_ always, you know, standing next to each other awkwardly.” 

“We should get comfortable with each other, right,” Even agreed. They stared at each other, motionless. “So, do you wanna…”

“Oh. yeah.”  Isak climbed to his feet. Even set Frank aside and stood in front of Isak. They laughed awkwardly. “Um, should we…”

“What do you want to…” Even said at the same time. They laughed again. Even took one of his hands gently. “Why don’t we start with this.”

Isak smiled and entwined their fingers. He took his other hand and did the same. “Is this…?”

“This is fine, Isak,” Even laughed softly. Isak’s hands were warm, thawing his own cold fingers. They swayed together for a bit. It was… nice. Weird. But nice.

“Uh. Should we… should we like, hug?”

Even wordlessly released Isak’s hands and moved them to his back instead. They moved closer slowly, like they were trying not to scare the other away. Tiny awkward shuffles until they were flush together, arms around each other. Even stroked Isak’s back in small movements, trying to sooth his tense muscles. The longer they held onto each other, the more they both relaxed into it. A hug was exactly what Even hadn’t known he needed. Strange that a hug from a new acquaintance could be so soothing.

“Um,” Isak said, voice slightly muffled by Even’s shoulder. He readjusted his head. “I think… I think this is good.”

They pulled apart, faces burning the same shade of pink. “Julio was right about you.”

“ _Julian_. And about what?”

“You really are a big old softy.”

Isak looked away with a crooked smile. “I am not.”

Even grinned at him and plonked back down on the couch. “So. Holding hands and hugging. Those are our limits?”

“Before you even think it, I’m not going to have sex with you.”

“I didn’t mean that,” he laughed. “Just discussing boundaries.”

“We don’t have to kiss, do we?”

“We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to. It’s not like we have a contract, or anything.”

Isak’s face lit up. “That’s not a bad idea.”

“I was joking.”

“I’m not.”

He pulled a notebook and pen out of his green backpack, flipping open to a blank page. “Isak and Even’s fake boyfriend contract,” he dictated.

Even laughed at him. “I wasn’t kidding about talking to my boss, you know. With a headline like that…”

Isak flipped him off and continued writing. “Rule one; tell no one, as per our prior discussion. Rule two; absolutely no feelings.” Isak looked up at Even’s scoff. “Seriously. This isn’t gonna turn out like one of your rom-coms. No feelings.”

That wasn’t going to be a problem. “Alright.”

They, meaning Isak, ended up with a complete list of eight rules in total; Physical affection was only to be in front of others, Physical affection stopped at hugs, No sex, No cuddling, Stick to their agreed upon story, They didn’t owe each other anything.

“Seems a bit formal,” Even said once Isak had read out the final list.

“This whole thing kind of is.”

“I’m still not really sure why we’re doing this, to be honest.”

Isak sat back on the bed. “I just… I don’t want to look like an idiot. I was planning on making a move on Julian, and turns out he’s got a girlfriend, so. I don’t know, I feel stupid.”

“Makes sense,” Even nodded. “I came on here thinking I was going to make some big romantic gesture for Sonja.”

“Like what?”

He hadn’t spent too much time planning it. Only hoping like a fool. Even shrugged, improvising, “Champagne. Rose petals. Cute little ‘come find me’ type notes. The hot tub. A grand confession. I don’t know.”

Isak scrutinised him for a short while. “You really are a dork.”

“It’s what I do.”

 

*********

 

Icy wind hit Even’s face. It woke him after a shitty nights sleep. He watched as they neared port. They’d crossed the Arctic Circle hours earlier. Even had wanted to capture the moment in the ceremony celebrated on deck, but it was held during the hour he’d actually managed to sleep right through.

“Doing alright?” a woman with long blonde braids asked.

Even nodded, folding his arms over the railing. “Taking it all in.”

“We’re visiting the Lofoten Islands today.”

“We are.”

“You know, people are like islands.” Even raised a brow. “We’re all little bits of mud and sand and rock, floating around in the ocean. And the only bridge to others is communication.” She spoke out to the sea, voice calm and certain.

“Huh,” Even said. She kind of had a point to Even’s sleep deprived mind.

The woman pushed off the railing. “They also say isolation is destruction,” she said, though Even had no idea who ‘they’ were supposed to be. “Time moves faster when you get older. Life is short, and then everyone you know dies one by one and then _you_ die. There’s really not enough time.”

That was… a thought. The kind that made Even feel small. 

The woman smiled. “So we can’t be wasting any time. See ya!” Even watched her cheerfully walk away.

The things she said stuck with him all day. He couldn’t quite figure out why. Strange ramblings usually made an impression on Even. Especially those that made the least sense. He supposed that was another part of himself; nothing ever made sense. That didn’t mean the things he saw and heard and thought and felt weren’t real. It likely made them more real.

She was right, after all. Time always did have a strange way of slipping away from him.

 

*********

The cold left a rosy tinge on Isak’s cheeks. He pulled his beanie even further over his ears. His gloves complicated the simple action and it took a few tries to keep it from sliding back up.

“Here,” Even chuckled. He reached over and fitted the blue beanie nicely over his ears, then gave his head a pat. They were squished together on a bus towards the top of Tromsøya island.

“You guys are so cute,” Vilde said, staring at them with a dreamy look on her face. “I’m surrounded by couples.”

“There are two,” Sana, another of Isak’s coworkers pointed out flatly.

Vilde tried giving her a look, but Sana remained unfazed. No one was going to out-stare her. Vilde gave up with a scoff. “Can’t I enjoy things?”

“If you stop posting us on snapchat,” Isak shot back.

The social media posts and stories had been constant, and Isak and Even quickly became her number two focal point, behind pictures of breathtaking scenery with an unrelated ‘inspirational’ quote or song lyric attached. As a result, Isak’s phone was on constant blast from his friends and classmates with countless questions he left unanswered. He complained about one friend’s intrusive personal questions the other night, while Even tried his very best not to laugh. The classic ‘who’s the man and who’s the woman’ thing never go old.

Vilde had posted picture after picture of the two of them sat next to each other at the Viking style meal they enjoyed at Stamsund the previous evening. Watching their Viking hosts perform a ritual sacrifice to the Norse gods was like taking a step through time. If it hadn’t been for all the phones and cameras out.

Even only wished he had the guts to ask her to take it down a notch. Or five. Social media and Even did not mix well.

“Isn’t this exciting?” Chris enthused. “It’s the first time we’ll all be doing an activity all together!”

“We all listened to that guy pray for the sun to return to hold off Ragnarok last night,” Mahdi said. He laughed. “Man, white people were into some weird shit back in the day.”

“I thought it was cool,” Mikael defended. “Bringing history back to life and all that.”

“It’s an important part of culture,” Noora chimed.

Mahdi smirked and Mikael narrowed his eyes. “You’re messing with us?”

“You make it too easy.”

The snow crackled under their feet when they stepped off the bus. Even took a deep breath of icy air. It was always the clearest.

“Welcome, folks to Tromsøya island,” their guide, Ana said. “I hope you’re all pumped with energy, because today we’re going to be skiing!” She looked around the group expectantly, which consisted of both Even and Isak’s coworkers, along with a few other passengers.

They eventually surmised she wanted some sort of show of enthusiasm, so the group let out a low-enthusiasm, “Woo.”

Ana quickly covered her falling expression, and went on nervously. “Uh. I see you’re all dressed nice and warm.”

“It’s important to keep out icemites,” said the same woman Even had spoken to the other morning about islands and time.

“I’m… sorry?”

She gave an emphatic nod. “Icemites. They feed on cold skin, leaving you more susceptible to frostbite and life-long numbness of the extremities.”

“What the shit are you even saying,” Magnusson said gruffly. “Who let you on here?”

“Better than a miserable, washed up business man,” she countered with a smile, brows raised high. Even liked this woman. “Not pointing fingers, here.”

“Okay,” poor Ana said, hands out in front of her like she was trying to placate a wild animal. “We, uh… we obviously all have fun with each other, don’t we?” Magnusson scoffed over her anxious laugh. “Um. Anyway, so, head over to Rumen, he’ll fit you all with skis and… yeah.” 

It ended up taking _forever_ for everyone to get the proper apparatus. Julian and Sonja played around the entire time, stirring an ugly feeling. He tapped Sonja’s pink nose, making her laugh the way Even used to love doing.

“Jealous?” Isak whispered into his ear.

“Maybe a little.”

They shared a smile. Isak held out his hand, expression a mix of daring and shy. Even took it gladly and pulled Isak into his side. “Me too,” he admitted.

It was a while before they actually began skiing. Ana and Rumen taught them the basics, demonstrating way more patience than they should’ve. The group joked around the entire lesson, tossing snow at each other and laughing when others fell. All while Julian and Sonja were being all cutesy right in front of everyone. That only made Isak cling to Even tighter. He clung back just as hard.

“Okay, guys!” exclaimed Rumen. He looked beyond done, but maintained a smile. “Looks like we’re all set to go!”

“Ever gone skiing before?” Even asked Isak while they slowly made their way to a good spot. Moving around in skis was a task made for only the most well balanced people. Even wasn’t sure he was one of them.

“Not since I was a kid.”

Even slipped and Isak grabbed onto his arm. He steadied quickly. “Me too.”

“Bet I’m way better than you,” Isak challenged, letting him go.

“Oh, you do?”

Isak raised his brows once, then took off towards a small hill. “Race ya!”

Even slipped again, fumbling to get a strong grip on his ski poles and struggled after him. He was puffing by the time he reached the hill Isak graciously waited at.

“Ready?”

“Bring it on.”

This would surely be a colossal disaster. They set off down the hill together. All was going well for the first couple seconds. It didn’t take long for Even to trip again, this time far enough to fall to the ground. Because gravity was a thing, he rolled down, tripping Isak shortly after.

“Whoa!”

He tumbled over Even and rolled down with him to the bottom of the hill. Isak was on top of him when they came to a stop. “Fuck, are you okay?” he laughed.

“Could’ve gone better.”

“For a cool guy, you’re not very graceful.”

“You think I’m cool?”

Even laughed at Isak’s eye roll. “You _look_ cool, but really, you’re one of those guys who’s a complete dork when you actually get to know him.” 

“You think you’ve actually gotten to know me?”

“Let’s see. You’re a photographer, a film snob, you have a weird attachment to your camera-baby, you have weird taste in music, you’re way too nice for your own good. You think you can cook, but you can’t. A _hopeless romantic_. Oh. And you’re a dork. That about cover it?”

“You forgot one thing.”

“What?”

Even grabbed a handful of snow and shoved it in Isak’s face. “That!”

“Fuck you!” They struggled about in the snow, play hitting and tossing snow, all while keeping their bodies close. Isak swore at him and they both laughed so hard, it hurt.

“Keep it PG, kids,” the blonde woman said, skiing past them effortlessly.

She made them realise how close they were. Their legs were entwined, chests pressed together, faces close. Even saw every little golden fleck in Isak’s eyes. He really was beautiful.

Isak coughed nervously. “Uh… sorry.” He shuffled around until he was sitting up beside Even.

He instantly grew colder. They watched the blonde woman swish around in the snow like she’d been doing it all her life. “Who is that lady?”

“My boss.”

“Seriously?”

“Skrulle, yeah. Why is that weird?”

Even sat back with a shrug. “It’s not, I guess. She just said these really weird things the other day.”

“She does that.” Isak climbed to his feet and held a hand out. “I want a rematch, by the way.”

Even was surprised by how easily Isak pulled him up. “Didn’t I win? I did technically reach the bottom first.”

“I will not accept losing like that,” Isak said fervently.

“I don’t think I can win any other way,” Even laughed. They began the strenuous journey back up the little hill, helping each other along.  

“So, you won’t cheat this time?”

“Cheat?! You think there are rules here?”

Isak walked with a silent smile. The next moment, he pushed Even into the snow and tried to bolt in the other direction. He’d apparently forgotten he was wearing skis and tripped over them the instant he took off.

They ended up half on top of each other again, this time at a strange angle that left Isak laughing into Even’s stomach.

“Who’s cheating now?” Even said.

Isak raised his head, one brow quirked. “You tell me,” he said, dumping a handful of snow onto Even’s head.

 

*********

Two days of quaint little fishing villages left the entire team yearning for excitement. Something grand, something breathtaking.

Even was still covered in bruises from the skiing incident. He didn’t mind them. Every time he caught sight of each bruise, a fond memory came forth. Rolling around in the snow like children. Laughing and teasing. Even hadn’t laughed like that in a long while. Not since Berlin.

Things were good.

It was still kind of awkward sharing a bed. Isak flinched away any time their feet or knees accidentally touched, even in his sleep. Even would wake lying half off the bed with a sore neck. Two long limbed guys in one small bed wasn’t exactly ideal. He wondered why the room only had one double bed if Isak had meant to share the room with Eskild. Isak had simply shrugged and gone back to his phone when Even brought it up. Communication was still a work in progress.

Things were… okay.

Several buses loaded to take the passengers out to North Cape on the coast of Magerøya. Even was holding Frank safely in his lap. The view from North Cape, as they’d been told by the captain, was not one to miss.

Nordic Escapes had ended up on a different bus to their new pretzel friends. Which meant Even got to sit next to Sonja for once. She was lovely in a thick orange sweater and brown coat. Her smile was even lovelier.

“What?” she asked, smile growing.

“You look nice today,” he said as if she wasn’t beautiful every single day.

Sonja touched her chest. “Thank you. Whenever Julian’s feeling a little down, I wear his favourite colour.”

An ugly pang went to Even’s gut. _Foolish heart_ , he thought.

“That’s sweet,” Noora said.

“Does it work?” asked Mahdi.

She smiled in that sweet, shy way of hers. The look of someone smitten. “It makes him smile, so. I like to think so.”

Even couldn’t blame the guy. He hoped this Julian guy realised the woman in his arms was made of sunshine. If nothing else, he hoped he knew that.

It took no time at all for Sonja to find Julian once they arrived. Almost as if they shared some sort of tracking device. When he saw her, he smiled brighter than the morning sun. Every little thing either of them did or said together, reeked of ‘forever’ and ‘eternity’. _Foolish heart._

“What’s with the frown?”

Even jumped at Isak’s sudden appearance. He shook himself out of it at once. “Nothing.” Isak studied him. “What?”

He shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets. “Nothing.”

“What?”

“Just… don’t like it when you… frown.”

That was interesting. Even replaced it with a smile. “Better?”

Isak started in the direction of the Globe. “Whatever.”

His attention was drawn back to Sonja when he heard her laugh the way she did when Julian was flirting with her. They swung their hands between them, whispering sweet nothings. Without thinking, Even grabbed Isak’s hand. To his surprise, Isak entwined their fingers without question. His tight jaw revealed he’d likely noticed the same thing.

Even wasn’t the only fool on this island.

They walked across the plateau hand in hand, fire igniting their steps. The view across the ocean was worth getting up early for. Even was annoyed, tired and freezing his ass off, but this made it all worth it. Frank had a morning cut out for him.

Isak was quiet while Even worked. He thought about what Sonja said on the bus. _Should I…_ He took another glance at Isak, who looked bored out of his mind. He was borderline miserable. _Eh, why the fuck not._ “What’s your favourite colour?”

“Huh?”

“A real boyfriend would know. What’s your favourite colour?”

“Um. Blue, I guess.”

“Why do you like blue?” He aimed the camera at him.

“Makes me feel calm, I guess. I don’t know,” he finished off with an uncomfortable laugh. “Why are you pointing that thing at me?”

Even smirked. “Never heard that before.”

Isak went red. “What?”

“Oh, that’s – that’s not what I meant. Although, I’ve also never heard it in that way.”

Isak laughed his first genuine laugh that morning. Even took the opportunity for a few quick pictures. Isak covered his face, embarrassed. “Come on, stop,” he said, still laughing.

“I can delete them if you want.”

Isak shrugged, regaining his casual stance. “Didn’t say that.”

Even laughed and took a few more shots for safety. Isak flipped him off, cheeky grin on his face. “That’s a good one.”

“What’s _your_ favourite colour?”

“Hm?”

“A real boyfriend would know,” Isak teased. He stepped closer. “What’s your favourite colour?”

“Green.”

“Why green?”

Even thought of green and everything else melted away. “Makes me feel safe.”

Isak laughed softly, looking out over the cliff side. “This is some hipster crap.”

“What is?”

“Talking about colours and feelings.”

Even focused Frank on Isak again, this time only to look through the lens. “You know something?” he said said while he adjusted the focus.

“What?”

“Your eyes are green.”

Isak looked away to hide his smile, but Even had already seen it. “Yours are blue.”

 

*********

“What do you think of the view?”

“Ocean, ocean and more ocean. Excellent.”

“Don’t be an asshole, Jan.”

A couple nearby passengers shot Even judgmental looks. An older woman who looked at him like he cursed her family to eternal damnation and a guy who could’ve been Magnusson’s doppelgänger, staring intently, as if he’d been listening in for a while. Even shuddered and walked a few paces away, pointing the phone back to himself.

“Am I being an embarrassment again?” pappa asked.

“You don’t have to answer that, love, we already know,” mamma interjected before Even could speak.

“I’m always getting bullied in this house,” pappa said with a fake whine. “Nobody loves me.”

“Oh, stop it, you old fool.” Mamma wrapped an arm around him and pulled him close. “Are we talking too much?”

“When do you guys ever talk too much,” Even said.

“Fair point. Alright, how’re things?”

“Seen any mermaids yet?”

“Not yet,” Even laughed. “I’ll let you know if that changes.” Looking at his parents, still in their pajamas, heads pressed together, reminded him of lazy Saturday mornings as a kid. He and pappa would make a mess making pancakes and when mamma complained, they started a tickle war. Mamma and pappa would always end up in a giggly embrace that went on and on. He thought of laughing in the snow with Isak days ago.

“What’re you thinking about?” mamma asked.

Even refocused, realising he’d zoned out for a second in front of them. “Just saw a mermaid.”

Pappa pointed a finger at him. “Whatever you do, son, don’t let her get to you. Don’t be mesmerised by her call.”

“You boys,” mamma said, shaking her head.

A message popped up above. “Shit, I’m supposed to be meeting Mikael in five minutes.”

“Highly sensitive information?” pappa joked.

More like arguments over the layouts of their web articles. Even and Mikael always had strong opinions on webpage design and neither was ever willing to admit they were wrong. Of course, Even was never wrong. “Something like that.”

“Okay, love, thanks for calling,” said mamma. She blew him a kiss.

He smiled. “Talk later, yeah?”

“Don’t get sucked in by those mermaids,” pappa said right before Even ended the call.

He began making his way down to Mikael’s room when he noticed two unfortunately familiar faces by the deck bar. Skrulle and Magnusson stood across from each other, old-western style. Their arms were crossed and their expressions said, ‘do not fuck with me.’

“We’re running in circles here, Maxi,” Skrulle said, voice just as calm as when she first spoke to him, only this tone was soaked in venom. It was the voice of someone Even did not want to fuck with.

Magnusson thought otherwise. Or perhaps it was the devil in him that numbed all fear or sense of danger. “Quit with the old nicknames, Skrulle, we’re long done with those.”

“You’re right, nicknames are for _friends_ , not traitors.”

That started a small outburst and the pair were talking loudly over each other, frustration increasing with every unheard sentence. Even decided he’d heard way more than he should’ve and walked past quickly, so as not to draw any attention to himself. It wouldn’t have mattered if there really were mermaids on board, nothing was getting in the way of their fight.

 _“We’re long done with those”_ , Magnusson had said. Did that mean… did Skrulle and Magnusson know each other?

 

*********

The snow was fresher in Kjøllefjord than anywhere else on their voyage. Possibly anywhere else in the world. Even easily glided through the soft terrain. Everyone had bundled themselves in several layers under thick parkas to protect themselves from the cold night.

There was an air of excitement among the group. This was the first night the sky had been clear enough for the Northern Lights to be visible. They hadn’t been out of the bus for long, and Even had already taken countless pictures. Frank was now safely in his case over Even’s shoulder.

Their guides Siv, Carl, Sondre and Ele spoke about the history of the village and the indigenous Sámi people while they walked them to the snowmobile station.

 “If any of you took history in school, you may well be aware one of the places the Sámi people inhabited was in Finnmark county, meaning right here in Kjøllefjord,” Siv puffed. Her breath fogged in front of her in the cold night air.

“Our little fishing town has been a trading post since the 1500s,” Carl added. “What not many people in bigger cities know is that the fishing business here really began booming after the end of the second world war.” 

“German military burned a large portion of our buildings and the residents had to scatter through Norway,” Sondre took over. It became clear this was rehearsed, which made sense for travel guides. “They had to rebuild, like many other villages in Finnmark.”

“What’s up with fires destroying entire old towns,” Isak said.

“Could have something to do with wood houses and fire departments not being as equipped back then,” said Sana. She appeared to be the least out of breath. “You’re supposed to be the smart one.”

“I _am_ ,” Isak scoffed. Sana was unconvinced.

Eskild wrapped his arms around their shoulders. “Aw, I love hearing my two little geniuses fight over who’s smarter.”

“It’s me,” they both said in unison.

The disagreement went on for a short while until they reached their destination. After a thorough debriefing, everyone was fitted for a helmet. Two people per snowmobile meant their friends teasing them about an opportunity to cuddle under the stars. In any other situation, it would have been terribly romantic.

“Who’s driving this thing?” Even asked, tucking his scarf under his parka. Isak took over, unzipping the jacket enough so he could pull the scarf further down to better cover Even’s chest and zipped the parka back up again. “That was very sweet.”

“Don’t need you freezing to death out here,” Isak said dismissively. He pulled the visor over his eyes. “I’m driving.”

“Like the big, tough man you are.”

“Shut up,” Isak laughed.

They climbed onto the snowmobile, Even’s legs almost encasing Isak’s. Siv and Carl rode in front of the group, while Sondre and Ele were at the back. “Everyone set?” Siv called back.

“Yeah!” was the collective response.

“Off we go!”

They began with a steady pace, gradually picking up the speed as they went along the snowy valley. Even was glad for the helmet, feeling the wind hit off it. He leaned in closer to Isak and looked up at the sky. The Aurora Borealis danced above them in shades of green and yellow. A faint purple hue framed it. This, Even decided, was the closest thing on earth to magic.

The prominent green calmed him as much as it captivated him. He couldn’t look away.

“You know, the Vikings believed the Northern Lights were manifestations of the gods on earth,” Isak said.

“Like Odin.”

“Yeah. They believed he picked the strongest warriors on earth to join him Valhalla when they died in battle. That’s why they celebrated fallen warriors so much. It was an actual honour because it meant Odin had probably chosen you.”

“Fun way to make someone want to die.”

“I don’t know if they _wanted_ to die,” Isak laughed. “That’s so dark, fuck.”

“That’s me.” Even grabbed onto Isak’s shoulders as they increased the speed. They were steady enough to enjoy the scenery, but fast enough that Even worried he might fall off without support.

Isak laughed when Even gripped him tighter. “You okay back there?”

“Awesome. Keep telling me about that warriors and gods stuff.” 

“Right, well the Vikings thought the Northern Lights were the Valkyries’ armour leading all the fallen warriors to Odin.”

“The Vikings have been supporting strong women since ancient times,” Even commented. “Valkyries are supposed to women, aren’t they?”

“Yep. Vikings are the original feminists,” Isak joked.

The faint purple in the Aurora Borealis deepened and lightened again with the dance. “It looks… sort of like a dragon or something.”

“The Sámi thought they were spirits sending them a warning, but a dragon sounds cooler.”

“Didn’t know you were on expert on this,” Even said, impressed.

Isak shrugged and adjusted his grip on the handles. “Used to read a lot.”

“Did you have a Norse Mythology stage?” Isak scoffed at the mere suggestion. Even laughed. “ _I_ did, but it sounds like you were into it way more than I ever was.”

“Yeah, well. I like knowing things.”

“Oh, I know.”

They rode comfortably together under the dancing lights among the stars. Isak told him stories about the gods and then a few funny things from his childhood. Even held onto him tightly all the way and listened intently to every word. It was the most they had ever talked.

Even was glad for it. Isak was as interesting, intelligent and funny as he was stubborn. He resolved to see this side of him more. The true Isak, whoever that was.

 

*********

There truly was nothing like an ice cold drink. And _nothing_ like having an ice cold drink surrounded by ice sculptures illuminated in blue.

The team sat around the bar in Kirkenes’ Snow Hotel, drinking some kind of frozen berry alcohol. It was much warmer inside than it was out, though Even still felt his nose turn pink.

“Hey, hey. Listen.” Chris tapped her phone.

 _Let it go_ played and everyone but her and Even groaned. “Whyyy,” Mikael complained.

She laughed gleefully. “Like I was going to come to an ice hotel and not play _Frozen_. Come on.”

“I don’t know why everyone hates it so much,” Even laughed. Chris gave him a fist bump.

“Overkill,” William said.

Magnusson took off the moment his phone started ringing. It wouldn’t have been unusual if he hadn’t waited until he was out of sight to answer the call. William stared after his father suspiciously.

“Okay, what’s going on with him?” Noora asked.

“I’m trying to figure it out.” 

“So there _is_ something!” exclaimed Chris. “I’m not going crazy.”

“Debatable,” Mikael joked. “Ah!” He rubbed the spot she smacked on his arm.

“I saw him talking to Skrulle one time,” Sonja said, voice quiet as though she was divulging a juicy secret.

“Who’s that?” Mahdi asked.

“Julian’s boss. The lady who always wears braids and says weird stuff.”

Even recalled their heated argument by the bar the previous morning. Not one for gossip, Even hadn’t mentioned it. He’d thought it was probably nothing. But for everyone to notice something strange was going on with their boss… “I’ve seen them, too.”

“Oh yeah? Were they yelling at each other?”

“Yeah. It sounded like they knew each other from before.”

“I’ve never met her before,” said William.

“He did have a whole life before you,” Noora pointed out. “Do you know all his friends?”

“They didn’t seem like friends,” Sonja said.

Even shook his head. “More like mortal enemies.”

“Everyone hates my dad, so it’s not really a surprise,” said William. The boy did have some sense after all. Even had no idea.

Noora scratched behind her ear the way she did when she had a new idea. “But there _is_ something going on,” she said in her ‘I’ve got a juicy scoop’ journalist voice. They all had one.

“We’re on the case,” Chris said, a finger in the air.

_How very riveting_

*********

Even dreamt of sirens and elation and confusion.

He woke with a face pressed in between his shoulder blades. Isak’s breath was warm on his back. He was snoring softly, the sound muffled by Even’s skin. The rest of his body fit nicely with Even’s.

Even lay still for a while, nightmares fading with each passing minute. He clung to Isak’s warmth. Until he rolled away. The ghost of his body remained on Even’s skin. He tried not to be disappointed. He wasn’t. That would be weird.

Isak’s legs were hanging half off the bed. Even had to carefully shift around him so as not to knock him off. It had never taken him that long to physically get out of a bed. All the while, Isak was snoring, happily unaware of Even’s plight.

Even felt he deserved a nice hot shower after all his trouble. He put Spotify on quietly in the bathroom while he washed and thought about his day. There were still unresolved layout issues with Mikael and Nordic Escapes online. Noora and Chris were set on uncovering Magnusson and Skrulle’s issue. And today, they were all heading to the Russian border on quad bikes. Right before the ship turned around to return back to Oslo.

They were halfway through their trip. It felt like it had been eighty four years and five seconds simultaneously. Frank had gotten more of a workout than ever. And in a week’s time, Isak and Even wouldn’t have to pretend anymore. They would part ways as planned and never speak again. Back on the tram that day, Even wouldn’t’ve given that a second thought. Now, however. He wasn’t sure how that made him feel.

Did they really have to never see each other again? They didn’t have to be together, of course. Even did not want to be with him like that. Not for real. Still, there was no reason they couldn’t be friends. Say hello any time they passed on the tram. Isak could tell him endless facts about Nordic history. Even would be so invested, they’d almost miss their stop everyday.

That didn’t sound so bad.

He heard movement from the bedroom while drying off and dressed quickly. Isak was sitting up, scratching his messy hair when Even returned. _5 Fine Frøkner_ began playing from Even’s Spotify.

“Morning, dear.”

“Morning,” Isak yawned. A deep frown set his face. “ _Why_?” he groaned.

“Why what?”

“ _Why_ are you listening to that song?”

Even held up his phone and did a shimmy. “Gabrielle?”

“Please do not tell me you like _Gabrielle_.” Even said nothing and swayed on the spot. “Oh my God, this is a fucking hashtag.”

The swaying became a full body roll – An attempted body roll. “What?”

“Like Vilde’s thing, the hashtag wtf.” Even frowned, still not getting it. Isak rolled his eyes and scooted to the edge of the bed. “Like, you find the _man of your dreams_ and he likes _Gabrielle_.”

Even waggled his brows. “I’m the man of your dreams, am I?”

“You know what I mean.”

Even danced closer to an unimpressed Isak until he was right in front of him. “Do I? I think you just called me the man of your dreams.”

“You fucking wish,” Isak scoffed, pulling in his lips to stop a smile.

“Come on.” Even pulled Isak to his feet and held onto his hands while he bopped about. Isak threw his head back, refusing to take part in the fun. “Come on!”

“It’s shit!”

Even’s laugh got Isak smiling through his eye roll. Typical Isak; he was awake for five minutes and had already rolled his eyes twelve times. He wouldn’t be surprised if Isak’s eyes didn’t come back one day. He told him so and Isak called him a dork like he always did.

After a while, he gave in and swayed along with him. “Is that enjoyment you’re having?”

“No.”

“I think you’re having fun.”

“I’ve never had fun in my life.”

Even stepped back. “I’d believe that.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Isak laughed. He bopped around with half of Even’s enthusiasm, but that was good enough. Even sang along to the last chorus and Isak pulled away from him with a groan that echoed around the whole room. “ _Stooop_.”

Even gave Isak the performance of a lifetime while he cringed and covered his eyes. The song faded into Nas’ _The Message._ Isak sighed loudly in exaggerated relief. If he thought Even was done, he couldn’t be more wrong. Even rapped the wrong words, bopping his head around and clicking his fingers out of time.

“No!” Isak grabbed Even’s arms and pushed them to his sides, rendering him motionless. Even waggled his brows cheekily while Isak tried not to laugh. “You have a really weird taste in music.”

“You don’t like Nas?”

“Come on, first you’re listening to some corny pop crap and the next song is 90s rap? Like, what?”

“It’s called variety, Isak.”

Isak let go of him and snatched his phone. His expression grew increasingly perplexed the longer he scrolled. “What is this playlist?” he laughed.

“What’s wrong with it?”

“You’re a weird guy,” he said with a smile.

“Am I still the man of your dreams?”

 

*********

Angelic voices blended with the stings effortlessly. An orchestra and choir performed _Lacrimosa_ from Mozart’s _Requiem_ in Tromsø’s Arctic Cathedral. The sounds were epic and haunting.

Isak rested his sleepy head on Even’s shoulder. It was nearing one in the morning and they’d had a long day. Sitting still in a dark room didn’t help keeping anyone awake. Even’s mind had wandered off several times during the performance, brilliant as it was.

He was busy imagining what he was going to have for his next breakfast when audience erupted in sleepy applause. There were a few whistles while the conductor led the humble bows. Isak sat up so they could both join in on the applause. Even felt a little guilty for having drifted off so many times while the musicians had given their all so late at night. And in a place of worship, no less. 

They were the first ones out into the cold, eager to return to the ship. To a warm bed. The Cathedral was illuminated in blue light, bright against the night sky. Isak rubbed his hands together. “We didn’t spontaneously combust.”

“…huh?”

“We were being gay in a church and we didn’t get set alight.”

“What’s this I hear about being gay?” Eskild asked, arms folded across his shivering body.

“Just about being gay in a church.”

Even laughed. “We were only sitting next to each other. You make it sound like we were making out.”

“How come you guys never make out?” Eskild asked.

“Yeah, we never see you guys kiss,” said Vilde from behind them.

They both jumped, having not noticed her arrival. “Maybe because you won’t stop putting us on snapchat,” said Isak just as their other friends began to gather with them.

“I don’t do it _that_ much,” she shot back. “You guys never do anything interesting anymore.”

“Like what?”

“Like trying to devour each other the way you did that first night on board,” Eskild said through a yawn. “God, that was such a good night.”

Despite his hazy memory the morning after, Even now remembered that night in vivid detail. The exact feel of Isak’s hands in his hair, on his neck, his ass. The memory shouldn’t spark as much joy in him as it did. He’d never need to know.

Sonja and Julian approached, arm in arm. “Take these two,” Vilde said.

“What about us?” Sonja asked.

“You guys are _all_ over each other _all_ the time.”

“Is that a problem?”

Julian nuzzled her temple. “Not for me.”

“Ugh,” the group groaned in unison.

“I think it’s cute!” Vilde said. Even wasn’t sure how she could be so chirpy while everyone else looked close to death.

“I think it’s hot,” Julian countered.

“Okay, enough,” Mahdi said, covering his ears. “I’m not old enough to hear this.” Neither was Even. Definitely not at 01:27.

“You guys never complain about these two being gross.”

“Because that would be homophobic,” said Isak. Julian’s face dropped and his eyes widened into the classic ‘stunned heterosexual’ look. “It’s a joke, Julian, you can calm down.”

Sonja laughed rubbed his back in comfort. “How about we both be gross and everyone tells us who’s worse?” 

Never had anyone had a worse idea.

“Oh, oh, I can make it a poll on Instagram!” Vilde said excitedly.

Isak held up a gloved hand. “No. No way am I going to have a bunch of thirteen year olds judge my kissing skills.” He shuddered. “Ugh, even saying it sounds gross.” 

“Fine, no phone.” Everyone looked at Vilde skeptically. “I _can_ be without it for five seconds!”

The awkward realisation that this was probably going to happen hit. Isak looked at Even hesitantly, thinking the same thing. They hadn’t kissed since that first night on the ship. It was in their rules. _Isak’s_ rules that Even hadn’t seen since. Could they really–

“What do you say?” Sonja asked. “Unless you’re too afraid we’ll win.”

Oh no she did not.

Even quirked a brow at a likeminded Isak. “Not a chance.”

“Well, then. May the grossest couple win.”

“I don’t want to see this,” Mahdi said dramatically, walking a few paces away, closely followed by Noora.

Even couldn’t fault them. This was utterly ridiculous. Though he never could resist a good challenge.

Sonja and Julian had taken it upon themselves to begin, arms wrapped tightly around each other. He whispered something about snuggle weather which had everyone gagging already. Julian brought her face to his and captured her lips in a searing kiss. It looked more like his mouth on her face than lips on lips. The group shuddered as the kiss went on and on. It finally ended with a wet pop.

“Mm,” Julian said appreciatively.

Eskild made an over the top gag, hunching his entire body over with it. “Ooh, that was _gross_!”

“Mm hm,” Vilde agreed.

“ _Why_ are we watching this,” Sana said flatly.

“Because we’re the grossest,” said Sonja. “Beat that, boys.”

They’d need to step it up if they wanted a chance at winning. At present, the odds were slim. Even knew they had it in them somewhere. He looked at Isak in question. The answer was Isak pulling him close, one hand on his waist, the other on his face. The fluffy glove cushioned his cheek nicely.

“Ready, my love?”

Isak smirked. “I was born ready, baby.” They heard Mahdi coughing in the near distance.

That was only the beginning. “Then come take what’s yours, baby.” Even kissed him first, hands on his upper back. 

It surprised him just how nicely their lips slotted together. Isak was feeling bold and parted Even’s mouth with his tongue. It left him a little… a _lot_ breathless. The desperate passion in their first drunken make out suddenly made sense. It was rare that Even had a kiss that stopped time. Made every nerve ending vibrate.

He pulled him closer so their chests were flush together. They kissed and kissed and kissed and kissed. Even kind of wanted to devour him. He kissed Isak’s lips, cheek, jaw, then down his neck in a series of fast little kisses.

Isak laughed and flinched away. “Whoa,” he squeaked.

Even laughed with him. “You okay?”

“I wasn’t ready for that neck action.”

“Okay! You guys win!” Mahdi exclaimed.

His voice startled them apart. Even had completely forgotten what they were doing. How could he have gotten so lost in it? A kiss that was only for show. It was in their rules. Physical affection was only for show.

Even was a fool.

“Yup, I think we can declare these two as the grossest _couple_ we know,” Mikael said.

“Definitely the worst I’ve seen,” said Sana.

Isak did a small bow. “Thank you, thank you.”

Even was too stunned to react. He forced a half smile and said to Sonja, “Better luck next time.”

She shrugged, burrowing herself further back in Julian’s embrace. “We’ve still got each other.”

 _Oof._ Even wasn’t so sure the group chose the right winner, but he wasn’t going to say anything with Isak smiling proudly like that. Their eyes met, a question in Isak’s. ‘You okay?’ he was asking. Even gave him a single nod, though he wasn’t sure that was the truth.

A feeling he did not want to analyse swirled in his gut. It reached his heart, making it lighter in his chest. That terrible, foolish heart of his.

 

*********

His foolish heart kept him up deep into the night.

Isak had been tossing and turning beside him for hours. They both ended up staring at the ceiling, having given up on the hope of sleep that night. Both aware of the others’ wakefulness. Both saying nothing.

When he lay completely still, Even could swear he felt the waves beneath them. The ocean. A vast place, fearsome to many. Stretched out over an endless path. Deeper than any human being has been able to visit. Dark, cold. Constantly invaded, yet always alone. Skrulle had said people were like islands. Even thought he was more like the ocean.

“Do you think hermit crabs remember their old shells?” Isak said, voice quiet.

“How many do they have in a lifetime?”

“I don’t know.”

“Never thought I’d see the day Isak Valtersen didn’t know something. Thought you knew _everything_?”

Isak chuckled softly. “Almost everything. So. Do you think they remember the old shells they grow out of?”

Even considered. What ever happened to the shells that got left behind? Some would be picked up by collectors. Others may be claimed by a different creature. All the rest sat in rock pools waiting for attention, some affirmation their existence meant anything. There were probably more sitting at the bottom of the ocean, never to be seen by an admiring eye.

Shells were not sentient, he had to remind himself. “I like to think they do,” he answered.

“So do I.” Silence. Then, “I’ve had to un-tag myself from every single one of Vilde’s posts,” he said with a laugh. “She started posting them on Facebook, too. My friend Magnus already won’t stop messaging me about it, I don’t need my mother to see this mess.”

_This mess_

The words were ugly. Two simple four letter words should not have left that bitter a taste in Even’s mouth. He clenched his jaw to rid himself of the ridiculous sensation.

“Have, um… have any of your friends been hassling you about it?”

“I don’t have social media, so no.”

“A photographer who doesn’t even have an Instagram?”

Even rolled over to face him. Isak turned his face towards him, waiting. “Nine months ago, I ran through my workplace at night.”

“Okay.”

“Naked.”

Isak rolled onto his side. “Oh.”

“I was working for this publication house in Berlin and I broke in one night and took off all my clothes.” He watched Isak’s face closely, trying to gauge his reaction. _Do you think I’m crazy?_ “I wanted to work on something and it couldn’t wait. But I’m not good with sneaking into places, so I triggered the alarm. I got out before anyone caught me, and. I didn’t actually leave the building, I went to the roof.” He squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t… I don’t know why.”

He stopped, wishing he could take back all the words he’d spilled, make them his again. Words he’d not meant to ever say to another person. His chest felt cracked open. Exposed. What had he done?

“Did – did you want to…” Even shook his head. “We can stop talking about this if you want.” Isak’s voice was soft, his eyes were kind. He deserved better than to be burdened with all of Even’s baggage. His _mess_. He nodded, not trusting his voice to say anything more. “Okay.”

He thought perhaps he’d try for an apology, if only a small one. “I – I’m… I.”

Isak ran a soothing hand over Even’s upper arm. “Let’s not talk about it.”

What a wonderful notion. Confession without the ugly words that went with it. Comfort without the neediness. Deference without the guilt of running away. Or, not quite.

_Let’s not talk about it_

Even wasn’t done running yet.

 

*********

“No, dude, listen to me,” Mikael said, growing impatient.

They’d been arguing over fonts at the café for half an hour. It became tedious eight minutes in, though neither was willing to compromise their part. It often ended up as a competition for who could stay stubborn the longest. Mikael always won.

“Why would we change size for the–” he tapped the back of his hand to Even’s chest as if to halt a movement. “Wait. Check that out.”

He nodded towards a couple standing by the entrance. _Why the fuck is he showing me–_ The woman moved back, revealing Magnusson standing opposite her. Skrulle flicked a long braid over her shoulder and laughed.

“Are they flirting?”

“They’re leaving.” Mikael closed his laptop. “Come on.”

“You want to _follow_ them?”

He slid his laptop and pens into his case and stood. “Why not?”

“Because we have work to do.”

“We weren’t getting anywhere with that and you know it, man.” He paced towards the exit, forcing Even to hurry after him.

“They’re probably hooking up,” Even said when he caught up. “Why’s it such a big deal?”

“Satan in human form and a chick who’s probably the closest thing on earth to an alien are sneaking around and you don’t want to know what’s going on?”

“Not really, no.”

“Where’s the journalist in you?”

“I’m not a journalist and neither are you,” Even laughed.

In any case, it was too late. Both Skrulle and Magnusson had disappeared from sight and there was no way Even was actually going to go looking for them. “Shit,” Mikael muttered.

He turned and crashed right into Chris. “Whoa!”

They helped each other steady themselves. “Uh. Sorry,” Mikael said, immediately getting flustered.

Chris offered him a big smile. “Don’t worry about it.” She gave his arm a pat and Mikael’s face softened.

 _Oh._ This was a new development. New to Even, that was. Had Mikael crushed on her all along and he’d never noticed? How could he miss something as obvious as the puppy dog eyes he was looking at her with? It was probably all the puppy dog eyes he’d been busy giving Sonja to notice much of anything else at all. He must’ve been really gone to never notice Julian was her phone background.

He hadn’t seen much of her in the last couple days, and he found himself… not minding at all. Now, _that_ was a new development.

“Oh, hey, did you guys see Magnusson and that Skrulle chick come through here?” Chris asked, bringing Even back.

“We did.”

“They left together, but we lost them,” Mikael said.

“Yeah, I walked passed them back there.” She gestured behind her. “They looked _cosy_. And then they saw me and pretended like they didn’t even know each other.”

“This is too weird,” Even said.

“It’s just like a rom-com, right? The asshole guy and the eccentric girl get together in secret.” She laughed. “But they’re like a match made in hell.”

That was the only way to describe it. Even didn’t want to spare another thought to the ‘mystery.’ Chris and Mikael had other ideas.

“Oh, I wonder if she dominates him,” Chris laughed.

 _That_ was an image made in hell.

 

*********

“To our last days together,” Sonja said. Several glasses of all different shapes and sizes clinked together. Splashes of alcohol splattered over their table.

Isak and Even’s coworkers had become quite the team in their time on this voyage. He wondered if he and Isak would’ve been friends had they not started their whole charade. It was likely, but they definitely wouldn’t have become as close as they’d become. In the metaphorical _and_ literal sense. Their chairs were so close their legs pressed together. Neither was in a hurry to move away. Even occasionally found himself pressing more. Every now and then, Isak would press back.

“Another beer, honey?”

“Yes please, dear.”

Like the first evening, everyone was too preoccupied with getting buzzed and chatting to bother the two of them. They kept up with their nickname game and little pecks on the lips, anyway. Kissing was acceptable now. As long as it was in front of others.

Sonja turned her attention away from her handsy boyfriend for five seconds to say, “Have you seen Mikael?”

He was laughing with Chris across the bar, looking at her with starry eyes. “Yeah. He’s really in love.”

“I keep telling him to suck it up and make a move.”

“You knew?”

“You didn’t? Oh. Sorry, I didn’t – I thought. Sorry,” she laughed nervously.

“Nothing to be sorry for,” Even assured her, watching Mikael’s cheeks tinge pink when Chris wiped an eyelash off his face. So, it _was_ something that’d been going on for a while. Mikael never said anything to him about it, but he talked to Sonja. That sat strangely in his gut.

Isak rubbed his back. “Slow down, babe.”

Even had downed half his beer when he’d only meant to take a sip. He set the bottle down on the table. “You know all about my shitty alcohol tolerance.” They laughed at the memory of their first morning together. It seemed so long ago now.

Things died down not long after that. Sonja and Julian excused themselves first. Gradually, all their friends departed until there was no one left.

Even was playing with Isak’s fingers long after they’d been left alone. “I, um. I want to thank you for the other night.” Isak tilted his head in question and _fuck,_ he was cute. “You know, how you were… there for me. That night after the concert.”

“I didn’t do anything,” Isak waved him off.

Even entwined their fingers. “You listened. You didn’t push, you just – you listened. Even when I didn’t want to talk.”

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s not,” Even urged gently. “Take a little credit, Isak, you… you’re really special.”

Isak smiled and looked down. “Thanks, I guess.”

“I mean it.”

He looked up. They stared at each other for a while in comfortable silence. Isak reached over to brush Even’s un-styled hair back with his fingers. He kept his hand in his hair. Even’s heart sped. Isak placed his other hand on Even’s cheek. His thumb gently stroked it while Even watched him in anticipation.

 _Kiss me kiss me kiss me,_ he urged.

Isak moved in slowly, slowly, slowly. He pressed their lips together gently once, then twice. He deepened the third kiss, leaving Even breathless again. _Fuck_. He pulled back just enough to smile.

Even stared at him in awe. “No one’s around,” he said. This couldn’t be for show. None of their friends were there to impress or gross out.

“I know,” Isak said.

Even returned his smile and pulled Isak back to him. They kissed again and again and again. Each one deeper, longer. Isak kissed his lips, cheek, jaw, then down his neck in a series of fast little kisses. Even laughed and brought Isak’s smiling face back to his. “Neck action, huh?”

“Um, I’m sorry, gentlemen, the bar is closing now,” a young barman said, looking a little flustered.

Isak rose and held a hand out to Even. He took it gladly and let himself be pulled up. “We were just on our way.”

They left the bar hand in hand. _Foolish heart_ , Even thought, smiling. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would also like to say that the fact my posting date is on International Women's Day brings exactly the wlw energy I need in my life
> 
> Anyway, Come say hi to me on tumblr at [thegirlnooneknows5](http://thegirlnooneknows5.tumblr.com/)  
> My ask is always open and I am always a lonely ass betch <3


	3. Part 3: I'm not in love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The boys rock the boat in more ways than one...
> 
> -Low level smut-
> 
> Check out the amahzing artwork [HERE!!](http://parallel-univers.tumblr.com/post/183359991584/the-edge-of-the-earth-with-you-for)
> 
> Listen to the Spotify playlist [HERE!](https://open.spotify.com/user/6yr78itaq8dirmhogtchd08zm/playlist/02IJsCnrXE3AfhXaNcfT55?si=0wGnYM1_Tl-lBs0mD6PTmQ) while you read :)

 

_Foolish heart_

Even shut their door and leaned back. That foolish heart of his thumped hard against his chest. He observed Isak across their cramped room, taking in his little smile, flushed face, bright eyes that revealed everything he was trying not to show. The excitement, the nerves. It circuited through Even’s veins.

“What do we do now?”

Isak took a breath. Stepped closer. “Are you drunk?”

The buzz in his body was slight, shadowed by the fluttering in his heart, his stomach. _Fluttering_. No, the three beers he’d had were not the cause of his intoxication. Isak had turned him into even more of a fool. “No,” he determined.

“Good.”

They smiled at each other for a few endless seconds before coming together. It was messy, desperate. Just a little too much. The kiss was sloppy at first and they laughed into it. They slowed it down, found their rhythm. Learned the shape of each other’s mouths. Drank in the heat of the other’s body. 

Even couldn’t decide where he wanted his hands. He moved them from Isak’s back, to his face, to his hair and back again. The softness of Isak’s hair contrasted so starkly with the hardness of his body. The force of that headbutt made sense now, with his muscles pressed against his own. He couldn’t take it.

Even pushed Isak’s hoodie off his shoulders. They stepped apart to rid him of it completely and started on his sweater. _Fuck_. Isak helped him out of his own and took his hand. He ran his thumb over Even’s fingers tenderly. It was so kind. His hands were so warm.

With a smile, he led him to the bed. Isak tripped while trying to get out of his jeans. Even’s laugh was cut short when Isak grabbed the back of his knee and pulled, making him fall against the bed, beside him. They laughed and kissed and touched until they were both naked. So long since Even had last been naked with another person.

Isak stopped their kiss to say, “I don’t have anything…”

Even played with the curls by Isak’s ears. So soft. He rested his forehead against his. “We don’t have to do anything.”

“Or we could do other things.”

Even pulled back with a soft laugh. Isak’s smile was cocky. He slowly trailed his fingers down Isak’s torso, making him shiver. “Want me to touch you?”

Isak nodded, breathing heavily. “Fuck, yes.”

Even kissed him once more and lowered himself to Isak’s crotch. “Want me to taste you?”

“Shit.”

“Isak?”

“Yes, please, fuck, do whatever you want with me.”

 _Christ_ , what that did to him. In that moment, he’d give him anything.

Isak arched off the bed when Even sank his mouth around him. “Uh, fuck,” he breathed. Even enjoyed Isak’s fingers combing through his hair, scratching his scalp. His little gasps and curses. The way he squirmed under his hands. “Wait,” he puffed after a while.

Even looked up, worrying he’d done something wrong. “Okay?”

Isak let out a breath and smiled. He shifted around until he was lying on his side. Even raised his brows in question. “Come up here.”

Were they really doing this? Even climbed back on the bed and swung his legs around, heart racing. Isak grabbed Even’s thigh to pull him closer. They were doing this.

Even slept like a baby that night.

 

*********

 

Waking up tangled with another person wasn’t a bad way to begin the day. One of Isak’s legs was over Even’s thigh. His arm draped across Even’s back. When Even opened his eyes, Isak’s sleeping face was right in front of him.

Even smiled and blinked at him sleepily, admiring his long eyelashes. He hadn’t noticed how pretty they were before. Thinking back, it should’ve been unmissable. Everything about Isak was pretty. Even scrunched his nose. That didn’t seem like the appropriate word anymore. Isak was beautiful. From his high cheek bones, to his squishy nose, to his bow-shaped upper lip.

The memory of what they had done last night resurfaced. They kissed and touched and took and gave. And after, they teased each other about which of them was better, who was more desperate, who had stronger stamina. All while wrapped in each other’s arms. Even pressed his face into the pillow to soften his joyful laugh. He could’t believe it.

Isak stirred beside him. He rolled over with a groan, untangling their limbs. That just wouldn’t do. Even scooted closer again and leaned over him. He gently blew on Isak’s face. Isak frowned and burrowed himself further into his pillow. Cute, Even thought. Time for a new tactic. He leaned in to nuzzle Isak’s nose with his, then lightly tapped at his face.

Isak flinched away, frown deepening. “Mmm.”

There he was. Even smiled. “Good morning, grumpy boy.”

“Mmpiss off,” he murmured sleepily.

“Good mooorning,” Even sang.

Isak smacked his hand away. “Go away,” he laughed.

Even stroked his cheek with the back of his index finger. “But I’m lonely.”

Finally, Isak opened his eyes. He narrowed them at Even and held back a smile. “Go jerk off, then.”

“Hm. Play with my dick, or play with you?” Even tapped his chin, pretending to mull it over. He leaned down, brushing their noses together. “I’ll go with you.”

“Don’t I get a say?”

Even sat up abruptly, ceasing all physical contact. “Of course, dear, how selfish of me. What would you like, my sweet? Do you want me to leave you alone?” 

He leaned away when Isak reached up for him. Isak laughed and chased him with his hand. Even moved further and further out of reach until he was nearly hanging off the bed. “Come here,” Isak demanded, laughing.

“Oh, so you do want me?”

Isak sat up and pulled Even closer, one hand around the back of his neck. He placed his lips over his, just touching. “You wish,” he said and pushed him away.

“Ouch,” Even laughed, a hand over his heart.

“Did I hurt you, baby?” Isak teased. 

“Yeah, babe, you hurt me.”

“Feel the burn.”

“Oh yeah?” Even tackled Isak to the mattress.

He struggled under him, shouting, “Piss off!” between fits of laughter. Even dug his fingers into Isak’s sides. “Stooop,” Isak hooted. “Ev – ha – en! Fu – ha – ck yo – ha – fuck you!”

It was only now, lying on top of him, that Even realised they were both still very, very naked. He sat up to look at him. Rosy cheeks and messy hair and pale skin. _Beautiful_.

Isak wriggled out from under him enough to sit upright. He pushed Even’s shoulder playfully. “Dick.” Pink cheeks turned pinker under Even’s stare. “What?”

“Just admiring the view.”

“You are the worst!”

“And you’re beautiful.” That rendered Isak speechless. He gaped at Even for several seconds while Even smiled fondly at him. “Don’t tell me no one’s ever told you that.”

“Not a ridiculously hot guy.”

Even raised his brows, smile growing. “You think I’m hot, huh?”

“So what?”

“So what are you gonna do about it?”

Isak rolled his eyes and leaned in. He actually kissed him this time, smiling into it. Being with someone new was never this easy. Never this intoxicating. Isak slid his hand down Even’s chest, going lower and lower and–

There was a series of loud knocks at the door. They both jumped, breaking the kiss. Isak glared at the door. “Who the fuck–”

“Wakey wakey, lovebirds,” Eskild sang from the other side. Even had never been more grateful for locks. “We’ve got a big day ahead of us, remember?”

“Why are you here, Eskild?” Isak asked flatly.

“We all agreed to have breakfast together,” Mikael answered instead. “Remember?”

Even had forgotten everything and anything else outside of last night. If only he could’ve foreseen what was to happen, he likely would’ve kept his entire day free to lounge around in bed. 

Isak fell back against the pillows. “Shit,” he sighed.

“We don’t have to go,” Even pointed out.

“Yes you do,” Mikael retorted. It made Even wonder exactly how much one could hear between these walls.

Someone smacked the door and Even jumped again. “You can leave your love nest for one day, boys,” Eskild said in a tone that was similar to a scolding teacher in elementary school. “If we don’t see you at breakfast in fifteen minutes, we’re coming back to get you!”

The two voices disappeared down the hallway after a long while. Isak and Even sat in silence, contemplating whether it was worth it to try their luck and stay in. Best case scenario, they got away with it and could stay in bed all day. Worst case, Mikael brought Vilde in with her phone.

The very thought was terrifying. They were better off not taking the risk

 

*********

 

Isak took Even’s hand without hesitation. They swung their hands between them happily while the group walked.

“Someone’s happy today,” Chris commented. “You guys are like, glowing.”

“I always thought it was weird when people said that, but she’s right,” Sana said. “Now that I’m seeing it with my own eyes, there’s definitely a glow.”

“Just in a good mood, I guess,” Even said, unable to stop his smile. Isak squeezed his hand.

“Isak is never in a good mood.”

He scoffed incredulously, throwing his head back. “Get lost.”

“Case in point.”

The girls giggled at that. Isak narrowed his eyes at Even when he joined.

“Nah, Isak acts all mean and tough, but really, he’s a big old softy,” he said because he was already in trouble anyway.

“Lies,” Isak countered.

“You _have_ been unusually happy this morning,” Eskild said from behind them.

“Almost giddy,” said Vilde.

Why was everyone so interested? They never hassled Julian and Sonja this much. Or perhaps they did. Even had made a habit of blocking out whatever was said about the pair. They were walking several paces behind, hands to themselves for once.

“They fucked, guys, come on,” Mahdi said. Several in the group burst into laughter as if they were still in middle school. “That’s what they call the ‘post-sex glow’. Mystery solved.”

“That’s why you didn’t want to leave your love nest this morning,” said Eskild.

“Can you stop calling it that,” Isak laughed. “It’s so lame, what the fuck.”

“I’ll have you know none of my ideas are lame.”

A short walk from port led them to Lofotpils Brewery. Their guide, Petter had met them at the ship and led the way. Lofotpils was the only craft brewery in Lofoten, as he’d told them. He took the group, later than normal, inside.

“Anyone ever been to a brewery along a waterfront?” he asked excitedly. Negative murmuring from the group was his answer. “In that case, welcome, this is your first.” He laughed awkwardly at his own ‘joke’ that no one realised was supposed to be a joke. Petter cleared his throat and started over, “Well. Heh. This place used to be a fish-landing depot. Until a local beer enthusiast, Thorvardur turned it into Svolvær’s first and only brewery.”

“Where’s the Thorvask guy?” another member of the group asked. He was a short man with a naturally pink face and tatty clothing, who was always drunk whenever Even had seen him onboard. According to Chris, the bartenders had even developed a relationship with him. Even wouldn’t be surprised if the guy had had a few already.

Petter forced a patient smile. “He’s unavailable today, unfortunately. So you guys are stuck with me today."

“Unfortunately.”

Even felt for Petter, he really did. Poor sap was trying his best. That was all anyone could ask for. He laughed uncomfortably. “So.” He quickly perked up. “We’re known for beers with distinct flavours. And if you’ll all follow me, I can explain why.”

Petter shared with them the beer making process, and the history of Lofotpils and it’s signature beers that had a ‘taste of pure nature’ while walking them around the brewery. Not the most riveting of their excursions, but it was nice to do something chill. Especially when Even would’ve preferred to spend all day in bed.

The tour ended with fresh beer tasting, with the group being served a brew poured straight from the fermentation tank. Isak downed his drink happily. He looked at the bottom of the glass, mourning the loss.

“Here,” Even handed him his.

“No, you don’t ha–”

Even closed Isak’s fingers around his cup. “I already had a sip,” he assured him. “More your thing than mine.”

“You two are so sweet,” an older woman in a bright red coat gushed. “Your mother must be so proud of you, taking care of each other like that.” She walked off before either boy could respond.

“She thinks we’re brothers,” Even laughed.

“The heteros are at it again,” Isak said.

An idea crossed Even’s mind. It was silly and entirely unnecessary. There was no way Isak would go for it. Would he? He was feeling bold today. “Want to give her a shock?”

Isak quirked a brow at him. “What kind of shock?”

Even took both his hands. “Come here,” he said, voice fond.

Isak let himself be pulled closer, smiling into a kiss. He quickly took over, opening his mouth wide. Even took the hint and slipped in some tongue. They released their hands to hold onto each other while they kissed and kissed and kissed. Even wasn’t sure how long it lasted, only that he was throughly _kissed_ by the time it ended.

They glanced in the direction the woman had gone off to, and sure enough, she was gaping at them, face as red as her coat.

Isak laughed against Even’s cheek. “Another day of making the heteros upseteros.”

“Whoa ho ho,” said Eskild. “That was some show.”

“Yeah, you guys go from never kissing in front of people to straight up sucking face,” said Mikael. He was looking at Even oddly. Like maybe he had a question or he was trying to figure him out.

Isak wrapped a smug arm around Even’s shoulder. “Well, you know. We are the grossest.”

 

*********

Even was getting worried. He’d been walking around for ages with no luck. 

“Oh, Noora.” He stopped her as they passed in the hallway. “Have you seen Isak?”

“I’m sorry, I haven’t. Is everything… okay…?”

“Oh, yes,” he said, plastering on a smile for her. “Yeah, everything’s fine. Just haven’t seen him all day.”

Her brows shot up. “All day?”

Even nodded. “I don’t know if he’s hiding from me, or avoiding me, or pranking me, or what.”

“Hm. Maybe – oh, hey, Sana.”

She waved her over and Sana approached with a quizzical expression. “What’s going on?”

“Have you seen Isak around?”

She pulled her lips in and shrugged. “Not that I can remember.” She nodded at Even. “Did you misplace your boyfriend?”

“Yeah,” Even laughed uneasily. “He disappeared while we were having coffee and I can’t find him anywhere. He’s not answering his phone either.”

“Okay, let’s not panic,” Sana said calmly. “This isn’t that weird for him, he probably had a phone call, or he’s playing some kind of joke on you.” _Some joke_. “So I wouldn’t worry about him running away with another guy or getting kidnapped.”

 _That_ made Even laugh. “I know, I’m probably over thinking it–”

A couple crashed against the wall several metres down the hallway, clinging to each other desperately. They looked very much like Skrulle and Magnusson in a passionate embrace. Strangely, the image did not spark hellfire. Seemed like Magnusson wasn’t satan after all, rather, a regular asshole.

“Oh, shit,” Noora said, excited tone hushed so as not to expose them as onlookers.

Skrulle gripped Magnusson’s butt, making him cry out into her mouth. They clumsily moved along the wall until reaching one of their rooms. They moaned against the door while Magnusson struggled to get it open without getting himself out of Skrulle’s death-hold.

The entire display was horrible, yet Even could not look away. It would be burned into his brain forever, he was sure.

Magnusson finally managed the door and Skrulle fell through, pulling him in with her. The door slammed shut, locking them away safely. Even, Sana and Noora all stared on in shock.

Even was the one to break the silence. “I don’t know about you, but that is going to appear in my nightmares.”

“It’s not much of a shock, I guess,” Sana said. “Those two have been acting sketchy since day one.”

“All we know is that they’re… doing… private things in there. We still don’t know how they knew each other or how they even got to that point.” Noora gestured down the hall.

“I don’t even want to know,” Even said, shuddering.

“Me neither,” Sana agreed.

Noora was still staring down the hallway with intrigue. Even couldn’t relate. He had to get away from there. “Well. Thanks for talking to me,” he said. “I’m gonna go find my misplaced boyfriend.”

“Good luck,” Sana said.

He gave her a salute and decided to give their room one more try. It made sense, if Isak really had taken a phone call, for him to be back in their room by now. He pushed the door open expectantly to… nothing. Nothing but an empty room.

Even sighed and plopped down on the bed, defeated. Something scrunched under him. He shifted over to find a folded piece of paper under him. ‘Come find me’ was written on the front. Even unfolded the paper to a little message;

 

_I was going to make this into a riddle or a scavenger hunt-type thing, but I couldn’t be bothered, so you get a crappy letter instead._

_Meet me at the hot tubs. Bring a robe._

_-Your not-boyfriend_

 

Even tripped over himself multiple times while dashing to the bathroom for his robe. He hurried down to the hot tubs, stupid smile plastered across his face. Excitement and anticipation surged though him, giving a spring to his step.

Isak was sitting in a hot tub when Even arrived, facing away from the door. He looked over his shoulder and turned when he saw him. They smiled at each other. “Hey.”

“Hey.”

“Took you long enough.”

“You disappeared.”

“Did I freak you out?”

Even undressed in front of him. He waited a while to answer. “Maybe.”

Isak laughed softly. “Just like a real boyfriend would.”

Even pulled off his socks, dropping them on top of his pile of clothes. He stood only in his underwear. “You gonna invite me in?”

“Get in.” He moved to the other side so Even could climb in next to him.

A soak in hot water was exactly what Even needed after the tragedy he’d witnessed earlier. He sat and reached for Isak. “Why are you so far away?”

Isak made a face at him and came closer as slowly as he could. He got comfortable next to Even, one leg over his thighs. “We’re all alone,” Isak said, briefly looking around the room. “It’s just you and me in here.”

Even smiled and leaned in to rest his forehead against Isak’s “Does that mean we don’t have to behave?”

Isak’s answer was a kiss that went on and on and _on_. He left Even flustered and panting. Wanted and wanting. _Fuck_ , Even had never felt anything quite like this before. It didn’t make sense, how powerful it was.

They pressed their foreheads together after, panting lightly. “I didn’t get the rose petals, but I did get us some beer,” Isak said.

Even pulled back, brows raised. “No champagne?”

“I’m not made of money,” Isak shrugged. He stood to grab two bottles he’d stashed beside the hot tub and handed one to Even. “And I wanted beer.”

They clinked their bottles and took the first sip in unison. “You stole my date idea.”

“You have all the best ideas,” he teased.

That couldn’t have been further from the truth. So many things Even wish he could undo. So many bad decisions.

Isak noticed Even’s drop in mood. “Even?” He asked tentatively. Even looked at him. “Did I… did I say something wrong, or…?”

“No. No, it’s not you.”

Isak placed a hand on Even’s shoulder and stroked it with his thumb. He was so kind. “We don’t have to talk about it.”

“No, I…” Even sighed. Time to stop running, just this once. A breath. “I told you I went on the roof?”

“When you worked in Berlin.”

Even nodded. “Berlin.” Another breath. “I wasn’t trying to hurt myself, not really. Just thought it was a nice night and the view from the roof was spectacular. It wasn’t, really. I just had it in my mind that I needed to see it. But, um.” He gulped. “I left all my clothes downstairs, so. I was walking up there naked”

The memory remained pristine, barely touched. It was horribly clear. The people gathering on the street, calling out to him. Some were screaming, others called him psycho. The crowd grew. More people and more and more. So many cameras. So many phones pointing up at him. Even didn’t understand why they were all so interested in him at the time. He wanted the phones to stop, to go away. He wanted everyone to _stop looking_.

“I was manic.” He searched Isak’s expression. There was understanding, but he couldn’t be sure nothing else was under the surface. He gulped. “A fireman had to coax me down. And then I was all over the internet.”

Videos titled ‘psycho guy has breakdown’ circled the internet. His workplace let him go. None of his friends wanted anything to do with him. Even was humiliated.

“Everything went to shit in a single night.” He huffed a bitter laugh. “I lost everything I built in Berlin and came back to live with my parents.” The way mamma sounded when she called the next morning. The utter disappointment and heart ache. That was something he could never forget.

Isak pulled Even in closer. He rested his head against Even’s temple. “You know that thing they say about how when you hit rock bottom the only way is up?”

“Yeah.”

“That.” Even laughed genuinely, but it was sad. Isak rubbed Even’s shoulder. “Really, though, look what you’ve achieved since. You work at one of the most popular travel magazines in Scandinavia. That’s pretty impressive.”

“Even if I’m just a lowly photographer?” Even joked sadly.

Isak pressed a kiss to his temple. Then another. And one more. “Especially as a lowly photographer.”

 

*********

They strolled back to their room like they were walking on air, heads light and hearts high. Dressed only in robes, clothes under their arms. Isak was whispering dirty things in Even’s ear while they walked. _Christ,_ he couldn’t wait to be alone with him.

Not having sex in a public hot tub was a common courtesy. As well as avoidance of a major potential health risk. Isak had teased him and touched him, and they couldn’t do anything about it until they were back safely in their room. He was a cruel, cruel man.

They were about to round the corner, when Even heard a sad little sniffle. Sonja was leaning against the wall, arms crossed and head down. She was crying in the corner of the hallway, far from her own room.

Even gestured to her with his head. “I’ll catch up to you?”

“Sure.” Isak nodded, glancing over at Sonja, then back. “When you’re done playing superman.” He released his hand and walked around the corner backwards so they didn’t lose sight of each other until he was gone.

Even shook his head, smiling. He walked over to rest against the wall beside Sonja. She acknowledged his presence with a loud sniffle. “Hey.”

“Hey.” They were quiet for a long while, Even mulling over a few different things he could say. He settled on, “If you want to talk… Or not talk. I’m a good listener. Even to silence.”

“Oh,” Sonja half-sobbed. “Just things with Julian. We’ve –” she took a gulp of air “ – We’ve been fighting lately and then tonight, he tells me he did something _so_ shitty and I just – I don’t know if can – be with him anymore.” Her voice shook with small sobs. “And I – I really thought he was – it, y’know? God.” 

Even wrapped an arm around her and pulled her in for a side hug. She fell into it easily and let herself cry against him. Even stroked her arm up and down, heart aching slightly at her pain. The clothes under his other arm kept slipping. He tried adjusting without moving too much. 

“Mm – I’m sorry you have to see this,” she said in her wobbly voice.

“No,” Even said gently. “You’re my friend Sonja, you never have to be sorry.”

She cried for a little longer before pulling away to face him. “Ugh. So gross,” she laughed while she wiped her eyes. Her mascara had smudged underneath.

“Still the prettiest girl onboard.”

Before he knew what was happening, Sonja moved in close. She pressed her lips to his, cold hands on his face. Even kissed back automatically, a strange swirl in his gut. Not the good kind. He frowned. This – this wasn’t right.

That very through seemed to hit Sonja at exactly the same moment and she moved away quickly. “Oh my God,” she said, hands covering her mouth, eyes wide. “Even, I – I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.”

He stared at her, aghast. The kiss was objectively nice. Sonja had soft lips. They fit well over Even’s, one slotting in between the other nicely. She used just the right amount of pressure. Yet, all it made Even feel was… wrong. The supposed woman of his dreams, and it felt wrong.

Sonja. She was intelligent, kind, unbelievably gorgeous. Even rarely had to filter himself around her. He could say whatever silly little thing came to mind. Where most people would scoff and laugh, she always listened attentively, even to his most wild ramblings. She spoke to every person like what they had to say truly mattered. Made people feel important. And her eyes were green.

Isak’s eyes were green.

_This isn’t right_

“Ugh, I’m so sorry,” Sonja said again, hugging her arms around herself. “I honestly don’t even know what came over me. That was so wrong, I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” Even stopped her. “Let’s forget about it, yeah? It was nothing.”

She nodded quickly. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s right. It was nothing.” She cringed. “Ugh, but I _am_ so sorry, it’s so unfair of me to put my shit on you like that. Who even am I?”

Even laughed at that and after a few seconds, Sonja joined. “I’ve made my fair share of mistakes,” Even assured her. “It happens.”

“Well, never again,” Sonja said ardently. “No offence.”

“None taken.”

She reached over to give his hand a squeeze. “Thanks.” Her hands were cold like his. And Isak’s were so warm.

“Goodnight, Even,” she said as she backed away.

Watching her go felt like a door closing for good. He bid it farewell. “Goodnight, Sonja.”

Isak was under the covers on his side of the bed when Even got back. He didn’t react when Even shut the door, facing the wall.

“Isak,” Even whispered. Nothing. He frowned, finding it strange that Isak would fall asleep so quickly. Isak shifted when Even sat on the bed. “Isak?” Even tried again. No answer. He couldn’t be sure if Isak was asleep or ignoring him. He placed a hand on his arm and squeezed gently. “Isak?”

“I’m sleeping,” Isak muttered, shaking him off.

Even took his hand back and chuckled. “Grumpy now, hm? Did you miss me that much?”

“Go to sleep, Even.” That wasn’t his playful voice.

“Are you okay?”

“Just go to sleep.”

His dismissive tone left Even with a sour taste. They’d been so happy just minutes earlier. So close. What changed in the ten minutes they were apart?

Neither of them slept well that night.

 

*********

The bed was empty when Even returned from the shower. Isak’s phone was gone, so he guessed he’d gone to breakfast without him. He tried to ignore the ugly feeling that sent through his body. He was probably overreacting.

_But what if I’m not?_

He shook the thought off and dressed quickly to try and catch up with him. Isak wasn’t at the buffet. He wasn’t sitting with his friends. He wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Even wondered if he’d missed another note on the bed. He didn’t remember seeing anything.

“You alright, man?” Mikael asked.

“Uh. Yeah.” He shook his head. “Yeah. Just.” Mikael waited for him to continue. “You haven’t seen Isak around anywhere, have you?”

“Lost him again?”

Even breathed a small laugh. Last night night came back to him like a wonderful dream. _Was_ it a dream? “I think so.” He couldn’t suppress the little sense of dread under all the remaining giddiness.

“Did you guys have a fight?”

“No. I mean, I don’t think so.”

It was like they’d switched places with Sonja and Julian. The pair sat at different tables, not sparing the other a single glance. Or perhaps the relationship issues demon had latched onto them as well.

The dread heightened all through breakfast. Isak didn’t show up until their excursion group loaded into a bus that was to take them to Atlanterhavsparken in Ålesund. They reunited with Tore, who enthusiastically told them their destination was one of Northern Europe’s largest saltwater aquariums.

Even waved Isak over, but he walked right passed him and sat with Sana towards the back. That stung more than it should have. It didn’t matter that much that he didn’t want to sit with him on the bus. It was only supposed to be a short trip, he assured himself.

Mikael looked at him, the unspoken question on his face. Even shrugged. Was everything okay? He had no idea. Rejection and confusion added to the dread, creating a messy mix within him. Whatever this was, wasn’t right.

He tried to convince himself it was only temporary. Maybe Isak just wanted to sit with Sana. He could’ve been dealing with personal issues this morning. It very well might have nothing to do with Even. Surely he was overreacting.

Tore was still talking when they arrived at the aquarium and Even realised he hadn’t listened to a single word. He hoped he hadn’t missed any important information. Nothing that could be more important than this.

The uncomfortable concoction of dread, rejection and confusion swam in Even while he waited by the bus. He prepared to say goodbye to the sensation when Isak approached. Even held his hand out, forcing a shaky smile.

Isak walked right passed him as if he hadn’t seen him, and _okay, ouch._ That was most definitely a snub. Mikael bumped his shoulder, shaking his head at Isak in confusion. Even was equally as lost. “I don’t know,” he said helplessly. He tried to laugh it off, but it sounded fake, even to him.

Mikael wrapped an arm around him as they walked towards the aquarium. It anchored him just enough to get through the brief introduction while they were led through the entrance. Maps were dispersed and the group was allowed to roam free for an hour and a half.

“Make sure you all meet outside the penguin park at 14,” Tore said, pointing at a spot on the map as if they could all see from where they were. They were in a much bigger group than the last time they saw him. “Have fun!” He shimmied off, leaving the group to disperse as they pleased.

Even considered going after Isak, but he’d already disappeared. Deflated, he walked around with Mikael and Mahdi. He took pictures mindlessly, contributing nothing to the conversation his companions were having, that ranged from sea horses to different types of pasta. What led to that, he had no idea.

None of the creatures he photographed, nor the unique layout of the aquarium was enough to distract him from the unpleasant feelings swirling in his gut. The thoughts of doubt crowding his head.

“Hey, what’s up with you today, man?” Mahdi asked when the clock neared 14.

Even shrugged, shoulders remaining slumped. “Didn’t sleep well.” Mikael studied him, but said nothing.

They were among the last ones to gather with the group when free time was up. Sonja and Vilde joined last, a few minutes after 14. They jogged over, expressions bashful. “Sorry,” Vilde puffed. “We got caught up.”

Sonja glanced at Even, averting her eyes the instant they met. It was a wonderful addition to the shitty feelings circulating Even’s entire body.

“Hi, guys, my name’s Amira and I’m one of the penguin handlers here at the park,” a uniformed woman said. “We feed our penguins everyday at 14:30, so it’s almost lunch time! If you’d all like to follow me.”

She led them to a display of penguins she informed them were called Galápagos penguins. A dozen little penguins waddled around on a bolder in their enclosure, watching the group curiously. They warmed Even’s conflicted heart just a little. He took countless pictures, barely listening to the information and facts Amira shared about them.

At14:30, two people entered the enclosure with buckets of fish. The penguins crowded around them while the people spoke encouraging words. They shuffled about, arranging themselves into a sort of order. The group watched on in delighted awe.

The one fact Even did catch was that these particular penguins were endangered and thus the rarest species of penguin. Excellent news. The small sense of joy he’d gotten from watching them quickly dissipated. He refocused on taking pictures while the group asked questions.

“Alright, guys,” Tore said an indeterminate amount of time later. His large hands made a resounding clap. “Why don’t we say a big thank you to Amira.”

The group clapped and cheered while Amira gave a small bow. “My pleasure, guys,” she said with a laugh. “It was great to chat with you. Enjoy the rest of your day.” She sounded like she meant it.

“Alrighty, folks, let’s head off!” said Tore, leading them through the outdoor area. They passed a giant octopus sculpture and a seal enclosure, making brief stops to observe before moving on.

Even walked behind the group, half-heartedly investing himself into his pictures. Isak was only a few paces ahead of him. This had to stop. He had to know what was going on, what went wrong so quickly.

He took a breath and caught up to him. Isak noticed him beside him, but made no acknowledgement. “Uh… how are you?” Even tried.

“I’m great,” Isak said, sounding anything but. He hadn’t looked at Even all day and it was _killing_ him. 

“Did something happen? What’s wrong?”

Isak scoffed. “Why do you care so much, Even?” He sounded more sad than vicious.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Look, you don’t have to worry about me anymore,” Isak said dismissively. “The day after tomorrow, we’ll be back home and we’ll never have to see each other again.” 

 _Ouch._ “Is that what you want?”

“What, Even, because we fucked once, you think this means something? Like it’s real?”

That stopped Even for a second and he fell behind. The ugly feeling transformed into hurt, which quickly spread. “Well, yeah,” he said honestly. It had felt real. Was he just a fool?

Isak was silent for a moment. “We both knew it was going to end like this,” he said in a small voice.

Even couldn’t accept that. “Please just tell me what happened. Did I say something, or–”

“It doesn’t matter,” he raised his voice just enough to get the attention of a few people in front of them. “It was all fake anyway. It doesn’t matter.”

“What… what do you mean it was all fake?” asked Eskild. He, along with Mikael, Sana and Chris were looking back at them, nonplussed.

Isak sighed wearily. “It was all fake, okay?” he said.

“What was? You two?” asked Sana, pointing between them.

“We faked it,” Isak confirmed.

Eskild looked lost for words. “I – but you – you’re – you guys are perfect together. I don’t – what?”

Isak shrugged while Even’s heart sank further and further, the ugliness in his gut enveloping it. “We made a bet.”

“What – why? A fake relationship bet, like who even?” Chris was equally as stunned as Eskild.

“Doesn’t matter,” Isak said. “It’s over now.”

Even wanted to stop him. Wanted to fight back, yell, ‘it’s real for me’. He wanted to fight for Isak, take him in his arms again, tell him whatever he wanted. The words muddied in his head and got stuck in his throat. He couldn’t say it. He couldn’t say anything.

_Foolish heart_

*********

Even clicked through his pictures on Mikael’s laptop, heart empty.

Isak had swapped over with Mikael the previous night and despite everything in him screaming to give it another shot, Even let him. Everything had happened so fast. They were friends and then lovers and in the span of a few days, Isak wanted nothing to do with him. Had he come on too strong? Did Isak realise Even’s feelings and get turned off?

Was it really all fake for him? It couldn’t be. Even didn’t believe it.

Mikael set down the book he’d been pretending to read. “Uh. So, I hear Magnusson and Skrulle got it on.”

“Mm.”

He shuddered. “Man, can you imagine?”

“I don’t want to.”

“I feel bad for the walls in that room.” He shuddered again, this time exaggerating the movement. “The horrors they’ve seen.”

Even tried to smile. The best he could do was a tiny quiver at the corner of his mouth. That was all his heart would allow.

Mikael moved from the little couch and sat in front of Even on the bed. “Okay. Talk to me.”

“About what?”

“You know. You and Isak.” Even closed his eyes.  “What really happened with you guys?”

“It was all fake, like he said. You were right.”

“But that’s not all,” Mikael insisted. He watched Even for a while. Even who couldn’t speak. There was so much left to say. And he couldn’t bear any of it. Mikael pulled his lips in, looking unsure whether he should go on. “Okay. Tell you what; I’ll tell you about me and you tell me about you. Deal?”

“About… about Chris?”

Mikael looked down with a small smile. “You did figure it out.” 

“I mean, yeah. You practically combust every time she talks to you.”

“Not every time,” Mikael laughed. “You make me sound like a middle schooler.” Even tried to smile, but once again was unsuccessful. “Are you mad I didn’t tell you?”

“More confused. But I think I get it. Some people are easier to talk to about particular things.”

Mikael shook his head. “It’s not that. It’s – it’s kind of stupid.” He laughed awkwardly. “Ah, fuck, this is so weird, wow. Um. I thought you knew the whole time. And because you never brought it up that maybe you didn’t… care?” Even raised a brow at him. “I know, it’s stupid.”

“Not _stupid_ , just – Why did you think that?”

“I don’t know, I guess… you never talk about those kinds of things – or any personal stuff, really. Shit, you’re my friend, but you kind of seem like the kind of guy who only goes for casual friendships. Like, you’ll talk to everyone and party with them and hangout, but you never get too close.”

“Wow, um. I – I’m sorry I give that impression.”

Mikael bit his lip. “No, it’s – I’m probably just projecting, man. I’m not saying you’re actually like that. Fuck, what am I even talking about?” He laughed uncomfortably.

“You’re right, though. I _don’t_ let people get too close.”

“How come?”

“Oh, you know. Fear of rejection. Abandonment issues. All the regular stuff.”

Mikael laughed more genuinely. “You don’t know how much people like you.”

“I feel like that’s bullcrap, though, you know? If no one really knows me, how can they really like me?”

“People see more than you think. Even some of the stuff you don’t mean to show. That’s why Sonja guessed my… my crush so easily.” His face darkened in an instant. 

“You really like her,” Even smiled.

Mikael smiled back. “Yeah.”

“So talk to her.”

“If you talk to Isak.”

Even sat back against the wall. He breathed a deep sigh, shoulders slumped. “I don’t know what the fuck to do.”

“Okay. I’m not gonna lie, I knew your story was bullshit, but, lately?” He shook his head slowly. “Lately, you guys’ve… You just connect. There’s something there, something real.” It was nice to hear someone else say that out loud. Even told him so. Mikael reached over to rub his shoulder. “I can’t tell you everything’s going to work out like sunshine and rainbows, but I think you should go for it. What ever’s happened, what ever’s going on with him. Don’t let him leave tomorrow without talking to him.”

The thought was terrifying. Even could bare his soul to Isak and get left like a fool. But at least he’d know, right? Could he stand the potential humiliation? The one thing he was certain of was if he never asked, he’d never know. Even wasn’t so sure he wanted to know.

It’d only been a day, and he missed him. His clothes on the floor, his sleepy voice in the morning, his rapping in the shower. The way he rolled his eyes and smiled at every one of Even’s jokes. Lying next to him at night.

Mikael was right. He had to talk to him. What could he possibly say?

 

*********

 

“Ugggh.”

Two arms wrapped around Even. He smiled despite his stiff neck and snuggled in closer. Breathed in deep. Snapped his eyes open. _Mikael_. “What the fuck,” Even laughed sleepily. He freed one arm and tapped Mikael’s forehead until he woke.

“Mmm _what_?”

“Good morning, cuddle bear.”

Mikael sat up suddenly and hit his head on the wall behind. “Argh, shit.” He rubbed his head. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Even laughed. “I don’t mind a bit of cuddling.” He leaned over to look out the window. His heart dropped seeing all the people gathered at the dock. “Oh, shit!” He fell over Mikael trying to climb out of bed.

“What?”

“We’re in Oslo already,” Even said once he managed to get to the end of the bed. He fell to the floor with a thump. “Ow.”

“You okay down there?”

Even ignored his aching buttock and climbed to his feet. He’d laid out some clothes on top of his fully packed suitcase before going to sleep. He thanked his past self and fled to the bathroom to pull them on as quickly as humanly possible. Shaking hands did not make that any easier.

This was it. This was his chance. He was going to find Isak and tell him he’d be there for him no matter what was going on. No matter how much he tried to push him away. He’d be here, waiting. There was too much between them to let it end like this.

Mikael was gathering their bags together when Even finished. “We’ve got until 12 to piss off.”

Even grabbed his phone from the couch. 11:17. _Shit._ “I’ll try to be quick,” he said, dashing out the door. There were guests everywhere, with gigantic suitcases and children beside them. Even weaved through the people, panic sitting at the pit of his stomach. He had to catch Isak in time. He had to.

He turned the corner, bumping into several disgruntled people who gave him sour looks. Offering quick apologies, he pushed on. He was so close. He reached the room just as Eskild was rolling a suitcase out.

“Eskild!”

He looked up, expression unimpressed. “Oh. Morning.”

Even halted, uneasy from Eskild’s unusual cold vibe. “Uh, yeah. Good morning,” he said, smile faltering. “Um. Is Isak around?”

“You just missed him.” Eskild pulled the door shut and extended the handle on his suitcase.

Even’s foolish heart sank. “As in he’s down the hall?” he tried, fool he was.

 “As in he left.” Eskild shrugged and walked past him. “Sorry.”

He watched Eskild disappear, taking all his ridiculous hopes and dreams with him. _Foolish heart_. That was it. It was over.

He stood there for a while, not ready to face the world just yet. _Suck it up._ Even dragged his feet back to his room, letting people bump into him as he went. Everything dulled around him. Every sound was muffed, every colour muted. Even didn’t deserve to sulk. He was an adult.

So what if Isak clearly wanted nothing to do with him. He never made Even any promises. It was all for show, just as he said. But, the way he kissed him. Those touches. The things they shared in the dead of night. Was that really all a lie?

He kept his had down when he returned to Mikael. “Let’s go,” he muttered.

Mikael took the hint and didn’t push. They checked out and exited the ship in silence, Even’s mind buzzing. He didn’t understand. What went wrong?

What went wrong?

Mamma called out to Even in the crowd. She waved her arms energetically, wearing a big smile. Even offered Mikael a quick, “See you Tuesday,” and approached her.

She pulled him into her arms the second he was within reach. “Oh, my boy.” She swayed from side to side, squeezing tightly. Even felt like a child. He hugged back just as tight.

“We missed you, kid,” pappa said. He was wearing the purple patterned pants mamma loathed with a passion.

Even laughed at them. “You let him out of the house like that?”

Pappa turned his legs, showing off the abominations. “Sometimes you need to stand out.”

Mamma put an arm each around them both and walked them away from the ship. Even dragged his monster suitcase behind. “We were running late and he didn’t have time to change. Otherwise, I would’ve cut them off myself.”

“Keep away from my pants.”

“You’d better hide them if you don’t want me setting them alight in your sleep.”

Even laughed, true and genuine. His parents were ridiculous. He wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Soooo,” mamma sang. “Tell us about your trip! What was your favourite part?”

Dancing with Isak in their room. Annoying him. Rolling around in the snow with him. Waking up next to him. Watching the Northern Lights with him. Listening to his embarrassing childhood stories, his ideas, his knowledge on Norse gods. Holding him. Being kissed by him. Even couldn’t say any of these things.

“The Aurora Borealis was cool” he said instead because it wasn’t exactly a lie. “And uh, we saw some reindeer.”

“Ooh, how gorgeous,” mamma gushed. “Did they come close?”

“No.”

“You alright? You seem a little down,” pappa said.

“Just tired,” he lied.

Pappa looked like he didn’t quite believe him, but he let it slide. How did he always know?

Troubles of the heart. What a silly notion.

 

*********

The office bustled all day. Conversation didn’t stray from work. At every turn, there was work to be done. The issue was due by the end of the month. There wasn’t a single moment to spare.

Mikael and Even had finally come to an agreement with the layout of the web edition. Lots of compromise and deals were involved. But they made it. All that was left to do was insert the actual articles when they were ready. They already had a few from each person. Sonja only had one article as opposed to every one else, so she ended up helping Chris finish off one of hers.

“Hey, anyone remember the name of the barman at the snow hotel?” she called.

“Alexander,” Noora answered.

“Thanks!”

The office was alive with inspiration and focus. More so than it ever had been in Even’s entire employment. He and Mikael sat together at his desk, for once in total creative agreement.  

Midway through the day, Magnusson walked out of his office and stood between Sonja and Even’s desks. The team looked at him with dread. His hands were in his pockets and he wore an odd expression. He cleared his throat a few times, adjusted his tie, ran a hand through his dark hair.

Everyone in the area was shitting themselves by the time he opened his mouth to say something. “Team, I want to congratulate you for all the work you put into the last two weeks.” That stunned everyone more than if he’d told them he actually _was_ the devil. “The trip was a massive success, Hurtigruten is very happy with how it went, and I know how hard you all worked.” He cleared his throat like it pained him to say this. “Well done to you all.” Mikael bumped Even’s shoulder. They couldn’t believe it. “Well. Back to work.” He turned on his heel and disappeared back into his cave.

They waited until he was gone to whisper-cheer, “Yeah!”

“That’s right bitches,” Chris said to herself in English.

“Why’s he in such a good mood?” Even asked.

“Getting laid,” Mahdi said.

Everyone laughed, then shuddered at the imagery. “Did you ever find out what’s going on with him and Skrulle?” Noora asked William. 

“Oh, yeah.” He pulled a face. “Apparently they went to university together. They’re seeing each other, but I think it’s supposed to be a secret.”

“They’re not very good at sneaking around.”

“You don’t have to tell me.”

“You walked in on them.” Even said. William’s contorted face gave him all the answer he needed. They laughed again.

“Oh, man, that’s rough,” Mahdi sympathised. “Your own dad.”

William dug the heels of his palms into his eyes. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Mahdi pat in his back in consolation.

“Speaking of relationships,” Mikael said and Even already knew where the asshole was going. “Anything happen with you and Isak?”

That got the attention of the entire team. They leaned forward, watching him expectantly.

They weren’t going to get much. “Nothing.”

“Not even a text?” asked Chris.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“That you want to talk?” Noora suggested.

Even shook his head once and sighed. “I don’t even know if he wants anything to do with me. He shut me out.”

“Even, you said yourself, if you never ask, you’ll never know,” Mikael pointed out and Even kind of hated him. He was right. He was _always_ right. “Here, look at this.”

Mikael brought up the folder Even uploaded his hundreds of pictures to and scrolled through until he found the pictures taken at North Cape. Among them, were dozens of Isak. Some were candid shots when he wasn’t looking. In others, he pulled faces and flipped off the camera. Even laughed at those. The rest were of Isak laughing and posing for Even. He was taken back to that day. Isak had told him his favourite colour was blue.

“See, look at that face,” Mikael said to their coworkers. He gestured to Even. “Look at that face and tell me that’s not a guy completely gone.”

“He’s gone, man,” Mahdi said. Even gave him a look Mahdi shrugged at. “You’re gone, Bech Næsheim.”

He sank in his chair. “Shit.”

“Just send him a message, like ‘hey, what are you up to? Can we talk?’” Chris said.

“That sounds like a fuck boy booty call message,” William laughed.

“You would know.”

He smirked and shook his head. Mikael pushed Even’s phone towards him. “Just tell him the truth.”

Even took the phone. “Fuck.” 

 

*********

Two days of silence.

Even stared at the unanswered message. _I miss you,_ was all it said. The truth. Exactly as Mikael advised. Isak had seen it. And remained silent. 

Even couldn’t stand it.

He’d have to go elsewhere. Someone who may be able to give him some answers. He brought up Eskild’s contact. Hovered over it. Then pressed. It rang for a while. Even was close to giving up when Eskild answered on the last ring.

“You’ve got Eskild,” he said, out of breath.

“Hey, Eskild.”

“Oh.” He cleared his throat. “Hi. Sorry, I didn’t look before I answered, so.” He gave a single fake laugh. “I wasn’t expecting to hear from you.”

He definitely did not want to talk to him. Even wondered where the upbeat, kind Eskild from the cruise had gone. He must know _something_ that can help him. “No, that’s – that’s okay.” He paused.

Apparently for too long because Eskild said, “Did you need anything?”

 _Shit._ Even cleared his dry throat. “Do you know what’s going with Isak?” Eskild sighed quietly. “Please, Eskild, he won’t talk to me. I don’t know what to do.”

“Have you tried contacting him at all?”

“He won’t answer. Eskild, please.”

“I don’t know if I should be…”

Even put his head in his free hand. “He’s your friend, I get it. You don’t want to share his personal stuff,” Even said sadly. “It’s okay. Sorry I bothered yo–”

“Wait,” Eskild sighed. “Okay.” Even held his breath. “Alright… he told me you guys hooked up. And then you had a date in the hot tub. And right after spending the whole evening making out with _him_ , you were kissing Sonja.”

Even’s heart stopped. “What?”

“Are you going to tell me you didn’t?”

“No, that’s… what exactly did he see?”

“Hm. He said he left you alone so you could talk to her. Then he came back because he forgot to tell you something and saw you kissing her. And when he heard Sonja and Julian broke up, he thought that was you, you know… shooting your shot.”

Even rubbed his forehead. “Fuck.”

“Is that not what happened?”

“It wasn’t – Eskild, I’m not interested in Sonja. I swear I’m not.”

They were quiet for a few seconds while Even had a crisis outside the café across his building. No wonder Isak wanted nothing to do with him. He probably thought Even got what he wanted and left. He had to talk to him.

Eskild took a breath. “Okay. Why did you kiss her?”

“ _She_ kissed me,” Even said wearily. Eskild started to say something about guys always saying shit like that, but Even cut him off, “Look, she was upset about Julian, and she’s my friend, so I went to comfort her. We hugged and then she kissed me. But she didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean it. We laughed about it and then we left it there. That’s all it was, Eskild, I swear.”

“And your crush on her?”

Even didn’t have to search far inside himself to find what he needed. “Gone.”

“And your intentions with Isak.”

“I really… I really care about him.” He yearned for him.

“Okay,” Eskild said, voice significantly kinder. “I believe you.” Even sighed his tremendous relief. “Do you want me to talk to him?”

Even rubbed his face again. He needed to see him. “Just… convince him to hear me out. That’s all I want.”

“Then, that’s what I’ll do.”

“Thanks, Eskild,” Even breathed. “Thank you.”

“Even,” Eskild said just as he was about to end the call. “If it helps, he’s been really miserable since the cruise.”

Even frowned. The thought of Isak miserable and alone did not spark joy. “Why would that…?”

“He really cares about you, too,” Eskild explained. “And I saw how happy he was with you before. I’m rooting for you.”

Even smiled. “Thanks.”

They bid farewell and Even’s phone pinged with a message. It was a picture of Chris kissing Mikael’s cheek. Under it;

 

 

> **Mikael:** I got the girl
> 
>             Go get the boy

 

*********

Even tapped at his desk with his fingers. He’d been staring at the clock for eight minutes. Only forty minutes until they could all get the hell out of there. It’d been a trying day.

He squeezed his eyes shut and massaged his temples. _Someone kill me._

“Excuse me,” Chris said to Mikael, leaning over his desk.

“Yes, Miss?”

She smiled slyly. “Can I borrow a pen?”

Mikael slowly pulled a pen out of his pen holder and held it beside his face. “A pen like this?”

“Oh my God, you’re fucking, we get it,” Mahdi complained.

“I agree, can the dirty talk stay at home,” Even said. He didn’t need this on top of his headache. 

“You guys are no fun,” Chris laughed on her way back to her own desk. “And we are not fucking, thank you. I am a lady.”

There was a scuffling of shoes from somewhere past their desks and Julian slid in. He was dressed in a fancy suit and carrying a large bouquet. Sonja shot up from her desk, eyes wide. “Julian! What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been without you for a week,” he puffed. Even noticed the sweat patches on the underarms of his sport coat. “And it’s been the worst week of my life. Well, after my grandma dying. That was pretty bad. But, I’ve missed you so much.”

Sonja looked around uncomfortably. “And so you came to my work place _while_ I’m at work?”

“It’s been so long since we last talked. I didn’t want to wait another second.”

This was like a scene out of a corny low budget romantic comedy. Even stayed the urge to capture the moment. Frank was at home today and Sonja would probably kill him.

Julian set the flowers on Sonja’s desk and kneeled in front of her, arms spread wide. “Sonja. You are the love of my life. You’re everything I never dreamed of because I didn’t think a woman like you existed. But you do. You make me laugh. You understand me. You take care of people. You work so hard. You’re so fucking beautiful.” Sonja laughed at that, tears gathering in her eyes. Julian smiled and got to his feet. “If we walk away from this now, we’ll regret it for the rest of our lives.” He took her hands. “I love you so much. Can we please move past this?”

“Come here.” She pulled him into one of those big, romantic, movie-style kisses.

Everyone in the office cheered. Even clapped through his laughter. It was lame, but Even had to give the guy A for effort.

“Will everyone shut up and get back to work,” Magnusson yelled from his office. 

Julian and Sonja pulled apart, laughing blissfully.

So many happy couples reminded Even of his own unanswered message. He’d tried getting over it. His heart was having none of that. It grew heavier each day. _Foolish heart._

“Oh, Even,” Julian said. “Isak wants to talk to you.”

He snapped his head up. “Huh?” At that exact moment, his phone pinged. He snatched it off his desk, heavy heart in his throat.

 

 

> **Even:** I miss you
> 
> **Isak:** wanna be gross with me?

 

Even laughed, tension releasing from his chest. All the weight lifted off and left him. What was left underneath; his foolish, foolish heart turning hopeful.

He grabbed his jacket and headed for the elevator, not bothering to log out of his computer.

“Good luck!” his friends called.

Even raced down the block, excitement buzzing through him. He felt more alive than he had since Berlin. Cliché as it was, Even now understood the feeling of running towards one’s destiny. He ran and ran and ran until he came to Ms Pretzel. Even slid to a stop, nearly tripping over. He took in the façade of the shop and entered, heart pounding for two reasons.

He was greeted by Vilde at the counter. “Even!” she said enthusiastically. Her expression suddenly dropped. “What are you doing here?”

“Is Isak here?”

“He just left,” Vilde said.

 _Not again._ “Where’d he go?”

“He went after you,” Sana said, walking around from the other side of the shop. “As in, he went to your building. He left maybe five minutes ago.”

“How could I not’ve seen him?” Even laughed, breathing heavily from his run. He understood why running without stretching first was a bad idea. He took his phone out of his pocket and dialled. _Please pick up,_ he urged, smiling while he waited.

“Even?”

“Isak! Where are you?”

“I’m outside your office, where are you?” he said, laughing.

“Ms Pretzels.”

Isak laughed one of those full body laughs and every last tendril of hurt disappeared. He smiled, certain this day was going to end well. “Why don’t we meet in the middle? Meet me at the tram stop?”

“Okay.” Even heard the smile in his voice.

“See you soon.”

“Yeah.”

He hung up and pushed off the counter. His body felt light, like walking on air. _I’ll go to the edge of the earth with you._

“Good luck!” Vilde said as he got to the door.

“He won’t need it,” said Sana. No more doubts.

He jogged to the place they’d spoken for the first time. _Now_ he was running towards his destiny. He laughed at how ridiculous it was. The last time they were there together, Even loathed the blurry sight of him. And now….

He stopped when Isak came into view, mere metres from the tram stop. They stood across from each other. Isak’s uniform was covered in flower. His hair was a mess. His eyes were green. He was beautiful.

Isak raised his eyebrows at Even in playful challenge. They walked slowly towards each other. “Hey,” Isak said. 

Even’s heart leapt. “Hey.”

Isak smiled and looked down. “So…”

“I’m sorry you saw that kiss,” Even said, ripping the bandaid off. “It didn’t mean anything.” It sounded pathetic to his own ears.

Isak looked up at him, shifting his gaze between both Even’s eyes. “I heard.”

“I don’t have feelings for Sonja. Not anymore.”

The corner of Isak’s mouth turned up. “Why not?”

Even reached over and brushed Isak’s fingers gently. “Because.” He took his hand. “I’ve never felt quite like this before.” He placed the hand on his thumping heart.

Isak gasped quietly. He smiled in a way Even hadn’t seen before. “Neither have I.” He entwined their fingers, bringing their hands back down between them.

“I really like you,” Even said, voice soft.  

Isak flushed. “I really like you. Sorry I assumed shit.”

Even laughed. “I’ll forgive you if you’ll forgive me?”

“Okay.” Strange how a complete stranger could come to mean so much in so little time. Isak stroked Even’s hand with his thumb. His hands were so warm. “What do we do now?”

Even leaned in, stopping just a breath away from his lips. “Want to be gross with me?”

Isak smiled and said, “The grossest.”

They kissed. And kissed and kissed and kissed.

 _Foolish heart,_ he thought, smiling into Isak’s lips. _Stay a fool._

  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, there we have it, my mates!  
> Almost thirty thousand words of ridiculous shenanigans. Hope you enjoyed :)  
> -Chapter titles came from Plan A by The Dandy Warhols, Fools by Troye Sivan and I'm not in love by 10cc
> 
> Once again, thank you to all those who helped little me along the way. Shout out to all the lovely peeps in the discord server! Now, go ahead and read the other wonderful fics in this year's Big Bang! And make sure you give 'em and their art some love <3 Well done errybody! 
> 
> -As always, come say hi to me on tumblr at [thegirlnooneknows5](http://thegirlnooneknows5.tumblr.com/)  
> My ask is always open and I am always lonely rip <3


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